Wind: (Sitting in auditorium) What’s going on
Cody: Didn’t anyone tell you
Wind: I ignore everyone. I wasn’t trying to listen
Cody: There was this group of people came to tell us about how smoking is bad
Wind: Don’t those after school specials already do that…. Probably better?
Cody: Oh, how bad could it be
(Loud dubstep plays)
Speaker: Yo, what’s up, whities, and a few of my-
acak Black Man: Niggas
Speaker: We had to pay him so we had someone to say the N word. Now, let us tell anda all about something. Cigarettes are not cool. anda ever see those people who think they are so cool. Here’s an idea, smokers. Y U NO STOP!
Wind: What the fuck?
Speaker: I’m telling you, whities and-
acak Black Man: Niggas
Speaker: If anda smoke, you’ll just look like this (Holds up a flat plank of wood). All thin and outta shape, when non-smokers look like this (A group of girls come and start twerking on stage)
Wind: I think I’m going to vomit a kidney
Cody: Wind, I’m scared.
Speaker: So, all anda whities and-
acak Black Man: Niggas
Speaker: Think before anda pick up that cigarette and light it up. Otherwise, you’ll be unhealthy and not cool. ERMAHGERD! How terrible! Isn’t that right, cat
Cat: (Gives a shocked expression)
Wind: I literally want to fucking die right now
Speaker: Yeah, that’s right. So, let us promote the Hashtag Stop Smoking, right kids
(All the students look in terror)
Students: (All buy cigarettes and start smoking and coughing)
Cody: (Lights large cigar) Oh god, I think I’m getting cancer
Wind: (Sticks five lit cigarettes in his mouth) Cody, I think that entire speech already gave us cancer
Every year, five anti-smoking advertisements give over 10,000 Americans lung cancer. We must stop these advertisements before it’s too late. Seriously, just tell your children not to smoke, parents, so we can avoid crap like this.
Cody: Didn’t anyone tell you
Wind: I ignore everyone. I wasn’t trying to listen
Cody: There was this group of people came to tell us about how smoking is bad
Wind: Don’t those after school specials already do that…. Probably better?
Cody: Oh, how bad could it be
(Loud dubstep plays)
Speaker: Yo, what’s up, whities, and a few of my-
acak Black Man: Niggas
Speaker: We had to pay him so we had someone to say the N word. Now, let us tell anda all about something. Cigarettes are not cool. anda ever see those people who think they are so cool. Here’s an idea, smokers. Y U NO STOP!
Wind: What the fuck?
Speaker: I’m telling you, whities and-
acak Black Man: Niggas
Speaker: If anda smoke, you’ll just look like this (Holds up a flat plank of wood). All thin and outta shape, when non-smokers look like this (A group of girls come and start twerking on stage)
Wind: I think I’m going to vomit a kidney
Cody: Wind, I’m scared.
Speaker: So, all anda whities and-
acak Black Man: Niggas
Speaker: Think before anda pick up that cigarette and light it up. Otherwise, you’ll be unhealthy and not cool. ERMAHGERD! How terrible! Isn’t that right, cat
Cat: (Gives a shocked expression)
Wind: I literally want to fucking die right now
Speaker: Yeah, that’s right. So, let us promote the Hashtag Stop Smoking, right kids
(All the students look in terror)
Students: (All buy cigarettes and start smoking and coughing)
Cody: (Lights large cigar) Oh god, I think I’m getting cancer
Wind: (Sticks five lit cigarettes in his mouth) Cody, I think that entire speech already gave us cancer
Every year, five anti-smoking advertisements give over 10,000 Americans lung cancer. We must stop these advertisements before it’s too late. Seriously, just tell your children not to smoke, parents, so we can avoid crap like this.