Mittens.
They warm your hands, protect anda from the cold. They're not a bad thing.
But imagine if for your whole life anda wore heavy mittens. If anda dial a phone, try to use a remote control, atau try to play a board game, you're still wearing mittens. Practically everything is much lebih difficult.
Right there.
Practically everything is much lebih difficult.
Remember that.
Now imagine this.
You're in a room with the TV on full volume. The radio is blaring loud, screeching music. The lights are flickering on and off. Everything anda see is magnified, is a much bigger deal than it normally would be.
That's your perspective if anda have autism.
Autism is a disorder acquired at birth that changes your life drastically. It can range from making change a bad thing in your mind to handicapping your speech. Not much is known about autism.
Why does it happen?
We don't know.
What determines the extremity of the case?
We don't know.
What is the cure?
We don't know.
But I speak for myself and hopefully anyone membaca this when I say I'd give anything to know. And yet, part of me is glad there is no known cure.
As the brother of an autistic I've always wanted to do something about autism.But what?
There are people who volunteer atau are hired to help autistic kids. They teach social skills to the kids. But of course that's not the only thing we can do to help.
Here's what I can do.
And I beg of anda to do it too.
Treat those diagnosed with autism, atau any disability for that matter, with the respect anda would give to any other human. And remember one thing:
Autistic kids are not dumb. They can't help it. Mark my words, if anda think someone's dumb because they have autism, you're dead wrong. lebih wrong than you'll ever know.
Let's take a closer look at my brother, Alex.
I'm eternally grateful, his case of autism is as mild as it is. His case is mild enough so he can still talk, but his behavior is very different than other teenagers. He has a habit of asking pertanyaan he knows the answer to. Like mentioned earlier, he takes small things very seriously. Here's an example: We're standing on a two-story tour bus in Washington, D.C. The bus moves a few feet with Alex still standing up, and he screams. Then, he starts bombarding our parents with irritated questions.
"Why did the bus move?"
"Is that going to happen every time I stand up?"
"Will anda answer my question?"
"Can anda make it stop?"
All loud enough for the whole bus to hear.
He has many other issues. One problem he faces, which is very common in autistic kids, is that he needs a routine. He's much lebih calm and secure ifhe is doing the same thing every hari and knows what to expect. It took years for my parents to teach Alex that change can be good.
But he has his strengths, believe me.
He has an uncanny memory. He can remember anything he's seen atau experienced in the past fifteen years. He's forgotten how to forget. Branching off from this are a few very handy abilities: Alex has memorized all his multiplication tables up to twelve, can read very well despite his occasional stuttering, and has a memory for directions like a GPS. He knows the number of every exit he's ever taken once. If anda get lost in a town he's just moderately familiar he can give anda dead-accurate directions to get anda home; the ultimate backseat driver.
He probably has a lot lebih issues than your average teen.
I'm so proud of him.
It takes an autistic child much longer to get to a milestone (being potty trained, learning to share, etc.) than your average child. The result? It just means that much lebih when he gets there.
While at times I like him and will talk to him atau play a game with him, other times he is insanely obnoxious atau embarrassing beyond belief. Sometimes it makes me want to say "I don't know these people." And in hindsight, I realize I need to learn. I need to learn, truly learn and know for life that autism is a part of who Alex is. I can't change it. I might not even want to. Alex wouldn't be Alex. I cinta him just the way he is.
Though I can clearly see it would be a thousand times lebih complicated to be autistic myself, having an autistic relative atau friend can spark many different emotions for many different people. If you're me, anda can be depressed easily. anda probably think Why me? a thousand times a day. If you're my mom, anda probably are happy to see your autistic son growing and learning, but I dare anda to look a hard-working mom, not to mention the mother of a disability-diagnosed child, in the eyes and truthfully tell her she's not stressed out.
You'd be dead wrong.
Most moms are stressed out. They may have to deal with their kids' many commitments and extracurricular activities. They might have a job to balance too. But imagine this:
You're the mom of an autistic boy. anda work from home. anda have another younger child to take care of as well. Your husband works full-time.
Then you're in my mom's shoes. And who wouldn't be stressed out? She works extra-hard to help her disabled son lead a good life.
Considering the infinite elements putting her, constantly, in tough situations, she does an incomprehensibly amazing job at handling our family of five, including my dog, who I always count.
Going back a step to my perspective again, anda can get a thousand different emotions from the experience of having autistic relatives. I've been sad, embarrassed, happy, and angry. In fact, the single thing anda can do to make me as angry as possible is to call my brother a retard. Don't try it.
I feel like I was put in this place for a reason. I feel like I was put here so I could be Alex's sister, so Alex could have a sister who does her best to make sure he's okay at all times. CHAPTER 2: ALEX
Alex may be different from other kids, but that's part of who he is. To make this book make sense without being edited unjustly and relentlessly, I'm going to mentally drop anda a chunk of my world. My brother could have his own dictionary. For instance, he uses phrases such as:
Zip, Zip It, atau Zip Mode: If he talks, there will be consequences. A much lebih positive and firm versus mean way to say "shut up" (he's been taught that words such as shut up, stupid, and idiot, are all close to swear words.)
Flap/Flapping: When Alex gets restless atau bored, which happens to be very frequently, he flails his hands atau knocks them together, usually accompanied oleh grunting atau cross-eyes.
Nap: The everyday word Alex dreads like death. He'll doze off when it's time, but the prospect of sleeping while it's still light out sets him off.
Scripting: Uttering lines and musik from video under his breath.
At my house, we use these words as casually as anyone else would say "toaster" atau "computer."
He also has a very odd perspective when it comes to punishments. His normal punishment is losing portions of his snack, which is a breeze for anyone but him. The other hari he was yakking away while he was supposed to be in "zip mode" and he lost two Doritos out of his snack bowl as a punishment, which is a huge deal for him. He was in an absolutely poisonous mood for the selanjutnya twenty minutes.
It's things like that that set him apart from others. he worst part is that no one gets it. People might say they understand, but they don't. People might say they know how I feel, but they definitely don't. They certainly can't even come close to the feelings my parents experience, much less Alex himself, unless they've experienced autism from the same perspective. And last but not least, other kids with autistic siblings don't even try to relate with me, which isn't saying much, because I've only met a few kids in my situation. I don't mean to come across like I'm trying to attract sympathy, because, as I've previously stated, I'd rather be Alex's brother than anybody else's.
Now to daftar the little things that make Alex, Alex. He loves Christmas, Thanksgiving, and all the other holidays, but only in the season. He has a peanuts video for almost every holiday, and he locks them away in his closet along with all the other holiday-themed tapes until it's the right season. Frankly, he might scream if anda ask him if he wants to watch The Night Before natal in July.
His mood determines everything. His current emotions are ever-shifting like the clouds, and our whole house's welfare can occasionally hang in the balance. One hari he's loopy as a bottle of laughing gas, and the selanjutnya he's wigging out over a five-minute delay getting home.
He also has slight hearing issues. Some noises sound magnified to him and hurt his ears, such as clicking your tongue. He even used to be scared of the toilet flushing. He hates when people cheer, for reasons I ultimately can't explain.
In ways anda wouldn't expect, he's just like us. Heknows his multiplication tables, he takes the PACER test, he even joined chorus; and believe me, he has got a voice and then some.
A lot of people may think he's drastically different than the rest of us, but the way I see it, everybody yields countless differences, and it's our differences that make us all the same: a human, a flawed work of art.CHAPTER 3: LEND A HAND
Being Alex's brother, it doesn't seem like there's much I can do to help with finding the cure for autism. When I get older, I am going to make a donation to Autism Speaks™, but for now, I can just make life easier for other autistic kids. It drives me insane to walk through a school and see that for some autistic kids, the world is a bully. Almost every student will mindlessly tease atau laugh at disabled kids. It makes me furious, and sad, that people can be so mindlessly cruel. Those people know who they are if they're honest with themselves. I must say a thousand times a hari now, "They can't help it. We can." And people should actually listen when I say that, because I've definitely had much lebih firsthand experience with autism than most other kids.
Just stifle the laughter. Can the insults. Tell anyone else who crosses the line to cork it and pass on the message. Make it easy on these kids. Be a role model, whether anda end up noticed atau not. Even the lowliest dirtbag on earth would want the same treatment I describe here if they were in these kids' shoes. But the real pertanyaan here, with an OBVIOUS answer, is would anda want that treatment? Dwell on that. Ponder it until it penetrates the very core of your mind. And under the condition of a sudden revelation, put your thoughts in action, and make a difference. Autistic kids are still people. They have feelings, thoughts, and in a half-decent world, friends. Never assume they're oblivious to everything anda say.
It makes me sad to see how many kids are blowing off the message of this chapter. A tiny difference will multiply into a huge difference if everyone makes a change for themselves and themselves only. Clearly, that's not going to happen easily, if at all. So for the people that truly care, keep up the good work, and tampil the world anda can make a difference. If anda could use some help getting started, here are a few ideas. Be the brave one to cut off the mean laughter. Offer help to the challenged child, atau even something as small as a morning hello, just drop the whole "alienation" bit. And once again, anda know you'd want the same.
I realize as I'm menulis this chapter I've diberikan an example of Alex in a disgruntled mood, but I haven't diberikan an example of Alex in his other common state: silly. When Alex is in a silly mood, he will say something acak and ask if it's funny. Here's a fictional example:
Alex chuckled helplessly. "GET YOUR DOPEY FEET OUT OF MY FACE!!" He grinned. "Is that funny?"
I peer over the puncak, atas of my phone and sigh, the corners of my mouth turned up in a barely-noticeable smile. "No, Alex. That doesn't make any sense."
"Is it hilarious?"
"No."
He chortled some more. "I've got the giggles. Hee-hee..."
Typical.CHAPTER 4: BROTHERS
I hate to say it, but I'm not the 100% black-and-white good guy anda may think I am. Alex and I are still brother & sister. We still fight, tease, bicker, and get into trouble. Loads of trouble.
My point? Well, that's rather hard to explain. I'll just write another example:
My mom sighed as our car sliced through the needle-like raindrops that were falling in tsunamis from the sky. Everything outside our Honda Odyssey was drenched to the core.
"You got a detention?!" My mom was exasperated. "You're in so much trouble, young man!"
"Yeah, Josh," Alex said, his eyes shimmering. "You really messed up this one."
"It's none of your business!" I retorted hotly.
"Not business. Buttwax!"
"Alex, business is the appropriate way to say it!" (If you're wondering, my family enforces rather polite language at home, because once something is in Alex's head, it never leaves. EVER. Not that I always color inside the lines, if anda know what I mean.)
"Buttwax."
"Business."
"Buttwax!"
"Business!"
"Buttwax!"
"Enough!" my mom bellowed.
"I had enough seven years ago," I grumbled.
"What?" Alex inquired, puzzled.
"Never mind," I murmured. As anda can see, we argue and tease just like any other brother & sister would, even if Alex's arsenal of insults is slightly undeveloped. I am sorry to have deceived my readers if they thought I was some kind of disability saint. I'm far from it. I'm really just an average high school kid. So know I have my faults.
Seriously.
CHAPTER 5: WANDERING THOUGHTS
I frequently wonder if I would be any different had I been an only child. Would I be drastically less morally correct? Would I be lebih optimistic? Would I be lebih lebih socially awkward? Even lebih mind-boggling, how would I have been changed if Alex was still my brother, but he never had the disability. I'm almost scared to think about it. I also have a hard time contemplating the many conflicting pros and cons that would appear if Alex weren't autistic. Or, even fathom the unthinkable, and imagine Alex and I being raised in an orphanage. It's terrifying. Absolutely terrifying.
All I know is that there are endless ways things could have turned out in a different scenario, so I'm going to work to make the best of the real-life situation.
As I continue expanding my writing, I realize I may have misled my audience. My parents aren't divorced, and it was foolish of me to leave my dad out of the picture. My dad has a full-time job and occasionally works Saturdays, so I don't see him all that much. He wakes me up at 6:30 every morning along with Alex, then takes to Reeds Brook on the way to work. He usually arrives back halaman awal at 5:30, but on some days (usually once atau twice a week) he'll work late and come halaman awal anywhere between 6:30 and 9 o'clock.
My dad is a very calming presence for Alex. My mom deals with Alex a lot, so she tends to get stressed out and sometimes slightly frantic, but it's not her fault. My dad is around less, and he always, no matter what, keeps his cool with Alex. He has the drive to sit down with Alex for forty menit and talk to make him understand what ever's troubling him.
My dad is fun-loving, kind, insightful, and an emotional and factual genius, and I couldn't ask for any more.
Back to Alex. Please, keep reading...
CHAPTER 6: AUTISM IN A NUTSHELL
I can't tell anda how many pertanyaan and feelings buzz around in my head when I think of Alex. Alex is also diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder. His first friend his age moved recently, and he was devastated. The first few days were fine, but then he absolutely collapsed. He would fret all day, all week, frequently cry, scream, shout, and throw fits, and for days in a row would cry himself to sleep. It was a depressing experience for me, but I don't even want to try to imagine it in Alex's eyes.
Like my dad predicted, the rough patch started to pass over, but it didn't go smoothly. lebih like a api burning out, the roaring flames stop, but as it wanes there are popping embers, crackling sparks in the ashes. The day-long depressions are done, but there are still small, two-hour episodes that leave him in a asam mood once in a while. As the negative emotions die, he still has his normal fits once in a while. During the period of depression, he would regularly bring up Ashley, his only worker who ever left without saying goodbye, which is actually his default subject of negativity. Whenever he's depressed, no matter what the subject, it always returned to Ashley. Mentioning Ashley is like asking for cruel and unusual punishment in the form of temper tantrums from your older brother.
While Alex had serious OCD, he would ask so many questions, it drove my mom over the edge. My parents had to come up with a daftar of pertanyaan that he asked a thousand times a day, type them up with he answers, and give him the paper so he could read the jawaban instead of asking questions, which was sort of effective, but he would work his way around it and find new things to ask. Pretty soon, it was so big a problem that my brother needed a designated time of the hari to ask questions, which again was partially efficient.
The other day, I was very annoyed that my brother was in one of his silly mood, and was saying some pretty disturbing stuff about Valentine's hari that I'd rather not repeat. In hindsight, I'm glad he was in that sort of gleeful mood, because it meant he wasn't depressed oleh his OCD. From sad annoying to happy annoying in the blink of an eye. Like most brothers, Alex is, yes, extremely obnoxious, what to siblings seems like all the time. Some people will know what I'm talking about here.
Anyways, as Alex recovers from his depression, I hope that things would return to normal. But the truth of the matter is that things will never be normal. There'll always be the yelling, the waves of depression, the altogether different lifestyle.
And like I've been saying all along, I wouldn't have it any other way.
THE END
They warm your hands, protect anda from the cold. They're not a bad thing.
But imagine if for your whole life anda wore heavy mittens. If anda dial a phone, try to use a remote control, atau try to play a board game, you're still wearing mittens. Practically everything is much lebih difficult.
Right there.
Practically everything is much lebih difficult.
Remember that.
Now imagine this.
You're in a room with the TV on full volume. The radio is blaring loud, screeching music. The lights are flickering on and off. Everything anda see is magnified, is a much bigger deal than it normally would be.
That's your perspective if anda have autism.
Autism is a disorder acquired at birth that changes your life drastically. It can range from making change a bad thing in your mind to handicapping your speech. Not much is known about autism.
Why does it happen?
We don't know.
What determines the extremity of the case?
We don't know.
What is the cure?
We don't know.
But I speak for myself and hopefully anyone membaca this when I say I'd give anything to know. And yet, part of me is glad there is no known cure.
As the brother of an autistic I've always wanted to do something about autism.But what?
There are people who volunteer atau are hired to help autistic kids. They teach social skills to the kids. But of course that's not the only thing we can do to help.
Here's what I can do.
And I beg of anda to do it too.
Treat those diagnosed with autism, atau any disability for that matter, with the respect anda would give to any other human. And remember one thing:
Autistic kids are not dumb. They can't help it. Mark my words, if anda think someone's dumb because they have autism, you're dead wrong. lebih wrong than you'll ever know.
Let's take a closer look at my brother, Alex.
I'm eternally grateful, his case of autism is as mild as it is. His case is mild enough so he can still talk, but his behavior is very different than other teenagers. He has a habit of asking pertanyaan he knows the answer to. Like mentioned earlier, he takes small things very seriously. Here's an example: We're standing on a two-story tour bus in Washington, D.C. The bus moves a few feet with Alex still standing up, and he screams. Then, he starts bombarding our parents with irritated questions.
"Why did the bus move?"
"Is that going to happen every time I stand up?"
"Will anda answer my question?"
"Can anda make it stop?"
All loud enough for the whole bus to hear.
He has many other issues. One problem he faces, which is very common in autistic kids, is that he needs a routine. He's much lebih calm and secure ifhe is doing the same thing every hari and knows what to expect. It took years for my parents to teach Alex that change can be good.
But he has his strengths, believe me.
He has an uncanny memory. He can remember anything he's seen atau experienced in the past fifteen years. He's forgotten how to forget. Branching off from this are a few very handy abilities: Alex has memorized all his multiplication tables up to twelve, can read very well despite his occasional stuttering, and has a memory for directions like a GPS. He knows the number of every exit he's ever taken once. If anda get lost in a town he's just moderately familiar he can give anda dead-accurate directions to get anda home; the ultimate backseat driver.
He probably has a lot lebih issues than your average teen.
I'm so proud of him.
It takes an autistic child much longer to get to a milestone (being potty trained, learning to share, etc.) than your average child. The result? It just means that much lebih when he gets there.
While at times I like him and will talk to him atau play a game with him, other times he is insanely obnoxious atau embarrassing beyond belief. Sometimes it makes me want to say "I don't know these people." And in hindsight, I realize I need to learn. I need to learn, truly learn and know for life that autism is a part of who Alex is. I can't change it. I might not even want to. Alex wouldn't be Alex. I cinta him just the way he is.
Though I can clearly see it would be a thousand times lebih complicated to be autistic myself, having an autistic relative atau friend can spark many different emotions for many different people. If you're me, anda can be depressed easily. anda probably think Why me? a thousand times a day. If you're my mom, anda probably are happy to see your autistic son growing and learning, but I dare anda to look a hard-working mom, not to mention the mother of a disability-diagnosed child, in the eyes and truthfully tell her she's not stressed out.
You'd be dead wrong.
Most moms are stressed out. They may have to deal with their kids' many commitments and extracurricular activities. They might have a job to balance too. But imagine this:
You're the mom of an autistic boy. anda work from home. anda have another younger child to take care of as well. Your husband works full-time.
Then you're in my mom's shoes. And who wouldn't be stressed out? She works extra-hard to help her disabled son lead a good life.
Considering the infinite elements putting her, constantly, in tough situations, she does an incomprehensibly amazing job at handling our family of five, including my dog, who I always count.
Going back a step to my perspective again, anda can get a thousand different emotions from the experience of having autistic relatives. I've been sad, embarrassed, happy, and angry. In fact, the single thing anda can do to make me as angry as possible is to call my brother a retard. Don't try it.
I feel like I was put in this place for a reason. I feel like I was put here so I could be Alex's sister, so Alex could have a sister who does her best to make sure he's okay at all times. CHAPTER 2: ALEX
Alex may be different from other kids, but that's part of who he is. To make this book make sense without being edited unjustly and relentlessly, I'm going to mentally drop anda a chunk of my world. My brother could have his own dictionary. For instance, he uses phrases such as:
Zip, Zip It, atau Zip Mode: If he talks, there will be consequences. A much lebih positive and firm versus mean way to say "shut up" (he's been taught that words such as shut up, stupid, and idiot, are all close to swear words.)
Flap/Flapping: When Alex gets restless atau bored, which happens to be very frequently, he flails his hands atau knocks them together, usually accompanied oleh grunting atau cross-eyes.
Nap: The everyday word Alex dreads like death. He'll doze off when it's time, but the prospect of sleeping while it's still light out sets him off.
Scripting: Uttering lines and musik from video under his breath.
At my house, we use these words as casually as anyone else would say "toaster" atau "computer."
He also has a very odd perspective when it comes to punishments. His normal punishment is losing portions of his snack, which is a breeze for anyone but him. The other hari he was yakking away while he was supposed to be in "zip mode" and he lost two Doritos out of his snack bowl as a punishment, which is a huge deal for him. He was in an absolutely poisonous mood for the selanjutnya twenty minutes.
It's things like that that set him apart from others. he worst part is that no one gets it. People might say they understand, but they don't. People might say they know how I feel, but they definitely don't. They certainly can't even come close to the feelings my parents experience, much less Alex himself, unless they've experienced autism from the same perspective. And last but not least, other kids with autistic siblings don't even try to relate with me, which isn't saying much, because I've only met a few kids in my situation. I don't mean to come across like I'm trying to attract sympathy, because, as I've previously stated, I'd rather be Alex's brother than anybody else's.
Now to daftar the little things that make Alex, Alex. He loves Christmas, Thanksgiving, and all the other holidays, but only in the season. He has a peanuts video for almost every holiday, and he locks them away in his closet along with all the other holiday-themed tapes until it's the right season. Frankly, he might scream if anda ask him if he wants to watch The Night Before natal in July.
His mood determines everything. His current emotions are ever-shifting like the clouds, and our whole house's welfare can occasionally hang in the balance. One hari he's loopy as a bottle of laughing gas, and the selanjutnya he's wigging out over a five-minute delay getting home.
He also has slight hearing issues. Some noises sound magnified to him and hurt his ears, such as clicking your tongue. He even used to be scared of the toilet flushing. He hates when people cheer, for reasons I ultimately can't explain.
In ways anda wouldn't expect, he's just like us. Heknows his multiplication tables, he takes the PACER test, he even joined chorus; and believe me, he has got a voice and then some.
A lot of people may think he's drastically different than the rest of us, but the way I see it, everybody yields countless differences, and it's our differences that make us all the same: a human, a flawed work of art.CHAPTER 3: LEND A HAND
Being Alex's brother, it doesn't seem like there's much I can do to help with finding the cure for autism. When I get older, I am going to make a donation to Autism Speaks™, but for now, I can just make life easier for other autistic kids. It drives me insane to walk through a school and see that for some autistic kids, the world is a bully. Almost every student will mindlessly tease atau laugh at disabled kids. It makes me furious, and sad, that people can be so mindlessly cruel. Those people know who they are if they're honest with themselves. I must say a thousand times a hari now, "They can't help it. We can." And people should actually listen when I say that, because I've definitely had much lebih firsthand experience with autism than most other kids.
Just stifle the laughter. Can the insults. Tell anyone else who crosses the line to cork it and pass on the message. Make it easy on these kids. Be a role model, whether anda end up noticed atau not. Even the lowliest dirtbag on earth would want the same treatment I describe here if they were in these kids' shoes. But the real pertanyaan here, with an OBVIOUS answer, is would anda want that treatment? Dwell on that. Ponder it until it penetrates the very core of your mind. And under the condition of a sudden revelation, put your thoughts in action, and make a difference. Autistic kids are still people. They have feelings, thoughts, and in a half-decent world, friends. Never assume they're oblivious to everything anda say.
It makes me sad to see how many kids are blowing off the message of this chapter. A tiny difference will multiply into a huge difference if everyone makes a change for themselves and themselves only. Clearly, that's not going to happen easily, if at all. So for the people that truly care, keep up the good work, and tampil the world anda can make a difference. If anda could use some help getting started, here are a few ideas. Be the brave one to cut off the mean laughter. Offer help to the challenged child, atau even something as small as a morning hello, just drop the whole "alienation" bit. And once again, anda know you'd want the same.
I realize as I'm menulis this chapter I've diberikan an example of Alex in a disgruntled mood, but I haven't diberikan an example of Alex in his other common state: silly. When Alex is in a silly mood, he will say something acak and ask if it's funny. Here's a fictional example:
Alex chuckled helplessly. "GET YOUR DOPEY FEET OUT OF MY FACE!!" He grinned. "Is that funny?"
I peer over the puncak, atas of my phone and sigh, the corners of my mouth turned up in a barely-noticeable smile. "No, Alex. That doesn't make any sense."
"Is it hilarious?"
"No."
He chortled some more. "I've got the giggles. Hee-hee..."
Typical.CHAPTER 4: BROTHERS
I hate to say it, but I'm not the 100% black-and-white good guy anda may think I am. Alex and I are still brother & sister. We still fight, tease, bicker, and get into trouble. Loads of trouble.
My point? Well, that's rather hard to explain. I'll just write another example:
My mom sighed as our car sliced through the needle-like raindrops that were falling in tsunamis from the sky. Everything outside our Honda Odyssey was drenched to the core.
"You got a detention?!" My mom was exasperated. "You're in so much trouble, young man!"
"Yeah, Josh," Alex said, his eyes shimmering. "You really messed up this one."
"It's none of your business!" I retorted hotly.
"Not business. Buttwax!"
"Alex, business is the appropriate way to say it!" (If you're wondering, my family enforces rather polite language at home, because once something is in Alex's head, it never leaves. EVER. Not that I always color inside the lines, if anda know what I mean.)
"Buttwax."
"Business."
"Buttwax!"
"Business!"
"Buttwax!"
"Enough!" my mom bellowed.
"I had enough seven years ago," I grumbled.
"What?" Alex inquired, puzzled.
"Never mind," I murmured. As anda can see, we argue and tease just like any other brother & sister would, even if Alex's arsenal of insults is slightly undeveloped. I am sorry to have deceived my readers if they thought I was some kind of disability saint. I'm far from it. I'm really just an average high school kid. So know I have my faults.
Seriously.
CHAPTER 5: WANDERING THOUGHTS
I frequently wonder if I would be any different had I been an only child. Would I be drastically less morally correct? Would I be lebih optimistic? Would I be lebih lebih socially awkward? Even lebih mind-boggling, how would I have been changed if Alex was still my brother, but he never had the disability. I'm almost scared to think about it. I also have a hard time contemplating the many conflicting pros and cons that would appear if Alex weren't autistic. Or, even fathom the unthinkable, and imagine Alex and I being raised in an orphanage. It's terrifying. Absolutely terrifying.
All I know is that there are endless ways things could have turned out in a different scenario, so I'm going to work to make the best of the real-life situation.
As I continue expanding my writing, I realize I may have misled my audience. My parents aren't divorced, and it was foolish of me to leave my dad out of the picture. My dad has a full-time job and occasionally works Saturdays, so I don't see him all that much. He wakes me up at 6:30 every morning along with Alex, then takes to Reeds Brook on the way to work. He usually arrives back halaman awal at 5:30, but on some days (usually once atau twice a week) he'll work late and come halaman awal anywhere between 6:30 and 9 o'clock.
My dad is a very calming presence for Alex. My mom deals with Alex a lot, so she tends to get stressed out and sometimes slightly frantic, but it's not her fault. My dad is around less, and he always, no matter what, keeps his cool with Alex. He has the drive to sit down with Alex for forty menit and talk to make him understand what ever's troubling him.
My dad is fun-loving, kind, insightful, and an emotional and factual genius, and I couldn't ask for any more.
Back to Alex. Please, keep reading...
CHAPTER 6: AUTISM IN A NUTSHELL
I can't tell anda how many pertanyaan and feelings buzz around in my head when I think of Alex. Alex is also diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder. His first friend his age moved recently, and he was devastated. The first few days were fine, but then he absolutely collapsed. He would fret all day, all week, frequently cry, scream, shout, and throw fits, and for days in a row would cry himself to sleep. It was a depressing experience for me, but I don't even want to try to imagine it in Alex's eyes.
Like my dad predicted, the rough patch started to pass over, but it didn't go smoothly. lebih like a api burning out, the roaring flames stop, but as it wanes there are popping embers, crackling sparks in the ashes. The day-long depressions are done, but there are still small, two-hour episodes that leave him in a asam mood once in a while. As the negative emotions die, he still has his normal fits once in a while. During the period of depression, he would regularly bring up Ashley, his only worker who ever left without saying goodbye, which is actually his default subject of negativity. Whenever he's depressed, no matter what the subject, it always returned to Ashley. Mentioning Ashley is like asking for cruel and unusual punishment in the form of temper tantrums from your older brother.
While Alex had serious OCD, he would ask so many questions, it drove my mom over the edge. My parents had to come up with a daftar of pertanyaan that he asked a thousand times a day, type them up with he answers, and give him the paper so he could read the jawaban instead of asking questions, which was sort of effective, but he would work his way around it and find new things to ask. Pretty soon, it was so big a problem that my brother needed a designated time of the hari to ask questions, which again was partially efficient.
The other day, I was very annoyed that my brother was in one of his silly mood, and was saying some pretty disturbing stuff about Valentine's hari that I'd rather not repeat. In hindsight, I'm glad he was in that sort of gleeful mood, because it meant he wasn't depressed oleh his OCD. From sad annoying to happy annoying in the blink of an eye. Like most brothers, Alex is, yes, extremely obnoxious, what to siblings seems like all the time. Some people will know what I'm talking about here.
Anyways, as Alex recovers from his depression, I hope that things would return to normal. But the truth of the matter is that things will never be normal. There'll always be the yelling, the waves of depression, the altogether different lifestyle.
And like I've been saying all along, I wouldn't have it any other way.
THE END
