The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic pelangi as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy

Corporal Agarn was feeling bored, and decided to go see the Captain.

Captain Parmenter: Hello Agarn.
Corporal Agarn: I am sick, and tired of the army.
Captain Parmenter: What for?
Corporal Agarn: We're supposed to kill ponies right?
Captain Parmenter: Not necessarily. Only if they try to attack us.
Corporal Agarn: There's no action here! All we do is just stand around, watching for something that isn't even coming towards us, and hope that the food is good. I'm just walking around in a circle, like a doughnut, with jeli inside it of course.
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: If anda were to leave the army, what would anda do?
Corporal Agarn: I don't know, but I know for a fact, that I won't have to deal with Dobbs, and his terrible skills with the bugle.
Audience: *Laughing*

Speaking of Dobbs playing his bugle, that's exactly what he was doing.

Corporal Agarn: anda see what I'm talking about?!
Captain Parmenter: Okay, so Dobbs is bad at playing at the bugle, but I'm not covinced about the no action thing happening.
Corporal Agarn: The last time somepony attacked us was two years ago.
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Walks into office, and looks at Corporal Agarn* No sign of the enemy Captain!
Corporal Agarn: I'm Corporal Agarn Vanderbilt!
Corporal Vanderbilt: Ooh, Captain, I didn't know anda did impressions.
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: I'm not impersonating anypony Vanderbilt. I'm over here.
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Walks towards Captain Parmenter, walks into his desk, and falls on the ground*
Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: Are anda alright Vanderbilt?
Vanderbilt: *Stands up* Yep. No sign of the enemy sir. *Walks away, and crashes into the door*
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: anda see what I'm talking about here?!
Captain Parmenter: anda better talk to the sarge about it.
Corporal Agarn: But you're the commanding officer!
Captain Parmenter: But the sarge is older then I am, and has lebih knowledge on military regulations then I do.
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: How does that work out?!
Audience: *Laughing*

So Agarn went to Sargent O' Rourke

Sargent O' Rourke: anda can't leave the army. Not after the business we started.
Corporal Agarn: What business?
Sargent O' Rourke: O' Rourke Enterprises. We have so many valuables to sell, that we could be multimillionaires.
Corporal Agarn: What's a multimillionaire?
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: Why don't anda stay in the army, and find out?
Corporal Agarn: Okay, I will.
Corporal Vanderbilt: *Shoots ground near Corporal Agarn*
Corporal Agarn: What are anda trying to do Vanderbilt?
Corporal Vanderbilt: Duffy mencuri my money, and now I'm going to murder him.
Corporal Agarn: That would work, if he was an ant.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ponies: *Singing* Though he goes on a rage from time to time, he is a very good friend of mine. And in Fort Courage he is well known as, Corporal Agarn.
Dobbs: *Playing the terompet poorly*
Corporal Agarn: I'm warning anda Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*

2 B continued