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Chapter 8: These Little Distractions

The selanjutnya morning my mother came into the room and pulled the covers down to reveal my tear stained eyes that had dark circles underneath them. I had barely slept every time I closed my eyes Jacob was there with that devastated look on his face. “My poor baby” she berkata as she embraced me. “Do anda want me to talk to him?” She asked. “No!” I answered quickly that certainly would not help anything. “I just don’t understand why he reacted this way about me liking a guy.” I said. My mother motioned for me to pindah over and she lay down selanjutnya to me rubbing my hair. “Jacob has always been very protective of you, he doesn’t know Nahuel very well and I am sure he is worried that’s all…” she trailed off leaving me with the feeling that there is lebih to the story. “Why do I feel as though everyone is keeping something from me when it comes to Jacob?” I exclaimed. “Maybe anda should talk to him Nessie.” My mother berkata quietly. “That won’t work because he clearly doesn’t want to speak with me.” I quickly got out of tempat tidur and got dressed for school, I didn’t wait for Aunt Alice to bring me her pick of the hari I think that she knew to back off this morning. I grabbed a pair of jeans, a t kemeja and a pair of sneakers. My mother stayed on my tempat tidur looking at her hands, then she looked up at me, “You can stay halaman awal today if anda would like I know that anda are very upset. anda are so much like your father, anda are good at putting on an act but I know how anda feel on the inside, I have been there myself it is horrible and I hate that anda are going through it I wish I could take the pain for you” her voice broke with emotion. “It’s fine mom, I have to go to school everyone already talks about me enough I can’t give them lebih material. Um, I was wondering if I could possibly invite a friend to my party tomorrow night?” My mother’s worried look was replaced oleh a smirk, “Don’t tell me it’s another guy I don’t think your father could handle it.” I laughed “No I actually met a decent girl her name is Sienna. Sienna Stanley.” My mother’s eyes flashed, “Does she have an older sister named Jessica?” She asked extremely interested. “Um I don’t know mom, I just met her remember?” She looked very serious, “You need to find out, I was friends with a Jessica Stanley when I was in high school, she was a very inquisitive girl if she is anything like her sister this might be a bad idea. It will be very hard to keep our way of life a secret around someone if they are poking for information.” I grimaced at my mother, “See! THIS is why I thought high school was a terrible idea at least if I were away at school I wouldn’t have to worry about bringing friends home! Sienna is not like that she point blank told me she doesn’t want to know anything. She is similar to Grandpa Charlie.” My mother sat for a moment thinking it over, “Ok”, she berkata “if that is the case then this just might work out but we all have to be very careful not to reveal anything.” “No problem” I promised, “thanks mom.” She started to head out of my room, “One lebih thing I berkata in a quiet voice that made her look at me in concern,” I highly doubt that Jacob will be driving me to school in the morning can someone give me a ride for the selanjutnya couple of days?” She looked at me and flashed me a determined smile, “Of course honey, your father and I can drop anda off” her eyes narrowed “we have an errand that we need to run after anyways.” We ran to my grandparents where my father was already waiting. The air whipping against my face helped me to clear my thoughts momentarily, which allowed me time to remember all that had happened with Nahuel yesterday prior to my blow out with Jacob. I was suddenly nervous at the thought of seeing him again, Knowing that I was guaranteed to say something stupid to him. My grandmother tried to convince me to eat something since I had been too upset to hunt last night. I told her that I wasn’t hungry and couldn’t help but notice the look of concern that she shot over my head towards my parents. My father smiled at her, “Don’t worry Esme I will get her something on the way to school.” She gave me a peck on the cheek, “Enjoy your last hari as a mortal my dear.” I grimaced at the thought, why did I have to have so much going on at once? “Bye gram cinta you.” I berkata emotionlessly and walked out the door flanked oleh my parents. They decided to take the Lamborghini, my mother’s car I rolled my eyes and said, “Don’t anda think it’s a little ostentatious to be dropped off in this, after driving an audi yesterday?” My mother relating to how I felt offered to drop me off at the corner so that no one would see I smiled at her gratefully. My father turned to face me when I was seated in the backseat, “Nessie, everything will be fine with Jacob anda will see.” I tried to smile bravely and act like I didn’t care but I knew he could read my thoughts as I saw the look of pain in his eyes. He hated seeing me upset, knowing that he couldn’t fix it. On the way he stopped and grabbed me a kue serabi, muffin and some jeruk, orange juice. “Thanks, I will eat in school.” I told him, they dropped me off at the corner and waited until I got onto school property before they sped off. As I walked into my first period biology class I slid into my kursi selanjutnya to Sienna. “Hey, she looked up briefly from her drawing and commented, “Wow anda look like hell.” Thanks I muttered. “Are anda hungry," I asked her. She gladly accepted my breakfast I knew I would hear it from my father later but food was the last thing on my mind I felt horrid over what I had berkata to Jacob. As Mr. Banner droned on I tried to figure out why I was so bothered oleh what happened between me and Jacob… was it the terrible things I said, atau the look on his face he was so hurt I cannot even describe it. Just reliving it was so painful. I couldn’t shake this disturbing feeling that our relationship was forever altered, and nothing would be the same. “Ms. Cullen, are anda feeling alright?” Mr. Banner asked mildly annoyed. “Oh, um, yes sorry.” I stuttered looking down at my text book desperately trying to figure out where we left off. Sienna scribbled something violently as Mr. Banner turned to face the chalkboard to point to a pertanyaan for me she handed me a note just in time. “I asked anda what is the term that describes cell death that is genetically programmed.” He waited for my answer. I didn’t even need to look down at the answer that Sienna had provided for me. “Apoptosis” I replied. He beamed at my answer and went back to the lesson. How ironic I thought to myself, cell death that is genetically programmed, that seemed to be the definition of my very existence the past few days. I had turned into my own worst enemy.
After class Sienna hunted me down. “Hey something is going on with you, I am not one to ask pertanyaan but I am worried about you,” she told me. “It’s nothing I told her.” I just had a disagreement with a really close friend. “I’m sorry” she said, “if anda want to talk about it let me know.” I loved the fact that she didn’t press me for information like everyone else did; I almost craved her company for this reason alone. “Thanks for bailing me out in there”, I berkata to her. “No problem couldn’t let Banner down he’s expecting anda to win the selanjutnya Nobel prize”, she smirked. I laughed it felt so good to laugh. “Hey what are anda doing later? I asked her I figured that maybe some time away from everything would be good for me and she seemed to be the right kind of company. Sure she berkata what do anda have in mind?” I don’t know lets meet up after school and we can figure something out”. She agreed to meet me in the parking lot and headed to her selanjutnya class. Throughout the rest of the morning my mind gradually wandered to Nahuel, I brightened up a bit at the prospect of seeing him, yet Jacob continued to gnaw away at me. I didn’t understand my emotions towards him I had never felt like this before, I contemplated leaving school and going to La Push but I knew that my father would find out and probably meet me there, and it wouldn’t be pretty. Finally, the bel, bell rang signifying the start of lunch. I grabbed my bag and walked into the cafeteria, I looked up just in time to see something that made my mouth drop open.