I dragged all three of my suitcases down the stairs at once and nearly killed myself in the process. I misjudged a step and went tumbling down after my fifty pound suitcases. Wow. Perfect.

After taking on the stair-obstacle course, I dragged my bags across the floor and out the front door. Great, it was raining. Well, raining was an understatement. It was raining damn rocks. Big, huge, hard rock drops. The porch was my only cover at the moment but, of course, my car was parked out in the street. With the raining rocks.

"Dee?"

Shit. Fighting with my sister, I could handle. Falling down the stairs, I could handle. Facing the damn rock-rain, I could handle. Seeing Nathan in all of his beautiful but untouchable glory, I could not handle. Turning my head to the driveway where he was currently standing, I realized just how much I could not handle it.

Nathan looked too damn good to be so wet in the rain. With his normally shaggy blonde hair stuck to his face and his big blue t-shirt that hugged his subtle biceps, he looked so damn hot. His glasses were wet and had rain droplets covering the lenses. He probably couldn’t see worth a damn, which was good because I probably looked like hell.

"Hey." I made my feet go one in front of the other and started walking towards my car, hoping that he couldn't see the way that my heat was breaking through my eyes. He was so good at membaca me. When I got to my car, I popped the bagasi, batang and threw my bags in. I stood there for a few seconds, trying to gather my wits.

"When are anda leaving?" He asked from behind me. It startled me, knowing how close he was. Maybe I was imagining it but I could swear that I felt his breath on my neck but he had Brooke now. The cinta of his life. He didn't need me. That thought was enough to almost bring me to tears.

"Um," I swallowed back my tears, "in a few minutes, I think." I turned around and sure enough, he wasn't anywhere near my neck. He was about a foot away, which was way to far away in my opinion.

Nathan nodded and stuck his hands in his pockets like he always did when he was nervous. This was the goodbye I was trying to avoid. "I just wanted to say that I'm so sorry."

"Sorry for what?" I couldn’t help asking. Sorry for not loving me? Sorry for loving Brooke? Sorry for shattering your jantung into a million pieces and then stepping on them?

His head was pointed towards the ground and he used his left foot to kick the back of his right foot. Another nervous sign. "For everything," he said. "I'm sorry for pulling anda in so many different directions. I'm sorry for ignoring anda even though anda did nothing wrong. I'm just so damn sorry," and then lifted his eyes to mine. The darkness of his wet hair and the lightness of his blue eyes cause such a contrast with each other that the sight was breathtaking. I was literally just standing there and staring at him.

What I didn't miss was the fact that he apologized for all of the wrong things. He didn't apologize for hurting me, for choosing Brooke, for my shattered heart. Then, he shouldn't apologize for things he wasn’t sorry for.

The rain had soaked us both through our clothes, and my teeth started to chatter. I once imagined ciuman in the rain but never having my jantung beaten in the rain. "It's not a big deal." Lie

"It is a big deal!" Truth.

I took in a deep breath, thankful for the rain because it was now masking my tears. "It isn't. I promise." Lie. "This was just a summer thing." Big fat, nose growing lie.

Nathan sighed and then stepped closer to me, the tips of our toes touching. He was invading my thinking space. "Don't lie." He berkata through clenched teeth. "I hurt you. Say it."

I didn't want him feeling sorry for me. "You didn't. See," I gave him a broad smile that probably ended up looking like a grimace.

"Damn it. Don't lie to me, Demi."

My whole barrier broke. The walls that kept my emotions in place fell all at once, which was very overwhelming. My shoulders slumped, tears fell even faster, and it felt like my chest had a thousand pound weight dropped on it. "What do anda want me to say?" I asked a little hysterically. "That anda broke my heart? Yes, Nathan, anda broke it. But there's nothing that can be done because anda cinta Brooke, not me. And that's okay. anda can't help what anda feel." Boy did I understand that lebih than anyone right now.

He stood there, staring at me directly in the eyes. For one moment, I thought that he would lean in and ciuman me. ciuman me in the rain like every teenager wanted. Maybe he would scoop me away and we'd leave bratty sisters and ex-girlfriends behind.

But instead he took a step away from me, like I was a dangerous snake that he just happened upon. He opened his mouth but then the screen door from the house open and close. Both of our heads turned towards the noise and Sarah, bless her, came walking down the porch steps and the driveway.

The interruption couldn't have come at a better moment because I was pretty sure that I didn't want to hear what he was about to say. My sister, oblivious to the intensely awkward moment she just intruded on, looked at me expectantly. "Are we ready to go?"

I nodded while trying to collect myself so they couldn't tell that I was crying. "My bags are in the back."

"All right," she berkata while getting into the passenger seat. "Let's get going. This town sucks."

I couldn't agree more.

Nodding to Nathan in a polite gesture, I got into the driver's seat. Closing the door, I told myself not to look in the rearview mirror when I drove off. I didn't want to see him slowly fade away from sight because that was exactly what was happening and I couldn't handle that.

But of course, as I slammed on the gas, I looked behind me to see him turn around and walk away in the opposite direction.