Chapter 20
While Alice was dragging me to see her family I was worried what will happen when I see edward I mean after all this years ,we moved on and stuff……..ooh I'm such an idiot what can happen??? Nothing can happed if he remmembers he left ME! I didn’t leave him! So what does he wants now?.....
I was thinking hard not realizing were she was dragging me when someone hugged me
-oh Bella I'm so happy to see anda look at you!!! anda havent changed at all!
Then he laughed his booming laugh,awww I truley miss Emmett he always made me laugh and made fun of me
-Bella honey,how are you?
Esme came closer and hugged me and started subing
-we missed you
Then Carlisle came and looked at me with concern in his eyes and hugged me lightly
-its great to see you
He berkata and patted my shoulder
Rosali just smiled at me and she seemed a little guilty about something that I didn’t know about.
Then jasper stepped closer and shook my hand this was the first time he touched me and then smiled
o.h m.y g.o.d
edaward!! What should I do?! What should I say too him………………then someone interupted my thoughts THANK GOD!!
-dear Bella! And Cullen's lets go to the hall!
Aro berkata and patted my shoulder and then took my hand probably membaca my thoughts and then smiled and berkata
-your welcom!
Under his breath and left the room and I followed him to the hall
We sat there talking for a few mins and I was avoiding edward not even looking at him
I was mostly talking to Alice,Emmett,jasper,jane and alec and Carlisle and esme and avoiding edward as much as possible
-so Bella are anda staying with us?!?
Jane asked me with hope in her eyes
-I think I am.
I berkata cause I don’t have any other place to stay
-Bella anda can stay with us if anda like atau visit sometimes??
Esme berkata hope in her eyes too
-esme I don’t know …..um…maybe.
I smile at her and she touched my shoulder thanking me
Then Alice spoke
-oh Bella! Lets go and change your dress you’ve been sleeping in that thing for a 100 years!
Oh great Bella barbie again I sighed but she was right I should change as soon as possible
Alice clapped her hands and went to bring her bag
she came back in 1 sec and dragged me again back to my room when we got there she brought out a beautiful black dress
-wow its beautiful Alice!
-you like it?!
-yup!
-oh this is wounderful so try it on and come down ok??? I'm waiting!
She berkata and went outside I took off my old dress and took a hot mandi, shower and put my new dress on and thinked about a paire of black high heels and then wore them. I was brushing my haire when someone knocked on the door.
-come in.
I berkata thinking its Alice but someone else came in that I didn’t expected
-you look beautiful
Edward berkata and closed the door behind him
-what are anda doing here?
I was shocked he is such an bas…..
-Bella I came to apologize..
I cut him off
-there's no need to
-Bella I'm sorry I thought if I leave anda ,you will have a normal life…
-and I had a great life untill…….
Pain filled my eyes I really wanted to cry,….i really missed matt
-Bella don’t be sad
-I am sad! Edward!you always thinked about yourself anda never cared about what I wanted!have anda ever thought about talking to me and ask me if I wanted anda to leave?huh? atau anda didn’t care what I wanted and just left me bleeding!maybe I wanted to be with anda no matter what!i didn’t even care if I died the hari jasper lost it!because I would have died happy knowing anda loved me……….
I covered my eyes with my hands and started subbing edward came to comfort me but I flinched at his touch and he took a step back pain washing through his eyes.
-Bella I knew anda didn’t want me to leave so I made this choice myself I wanted anda to have a big family…
-and die!
I berkata anger in my voice
-no Bella at first that I met anda I wanted to ask Carlisle to change but that wasn’t faire to anda that would have been selfish of me
-havnt anda thought maybe I wanted what anda didn’t want?!
-Bella I'm sorry I made a mistake! I tried to track anda down but anda kept disappearing from place to place………
-Bella I cinta anda I cant leave without anda and these years that we were separate I thought I was dead1everyone tried to cheer me up but…….failed.
I snorted
-I guess Tanya didn’t
I berkata bitterly
-Bella I needed a distraction and rose was telling me stuff like I needed to forget anda live my life…….and all thease crap.im sorry Bella really I cant leavr if anda don’t take me back!
He cried and held my hand
While Alice was dragging me to see her family I was worried what will happen when I see edward I mean after all this years ,we moved on and stuff……..ooh I'm such an idiot what can happen??? Nothing can happed if he remmembers he left ME! I didn’t leave him! So what does he wants now?.....
I was thinking hard not realizing were she was dragging me when someone hugged me
-oh Bella I'm so happy to see anda look at you!!! anda havent changed at all!
Then he laughed his booming laugh,awww I truley miss Emmett he always made me laugh and made fun of me
-Bella honey,how are you?
Esme came closer and hugged me and started subing
-we missed you
Then Carlisle came and looked at me with concern in his eyes and hugged me lightly
-its great to see you
He berkata and patted my shoulder
Rosali just smiled at me and she seemed a little guilty about something that I didn’t know about.
Then jasper stepped closer and shook my hand this was the first time he touched me and then smiled
o.h m.y g.o.d
edaward!! What should I do?! What should I say too him………………then someone interupted my thoughts THANK GOD!!
-dear Bella! And Cullen's lets go to the hall!
Aro berkata and patted my shoulder and then took my hand probably membaca my thoughts and then smiled and berkata
-your welcom!
Under his breath and left the room and I followed him to the hall
We sat there talking for a few mins and I was avoiding edward not even looking at him
I was mostly talking to Alice,Emmett,jasper,jane and alec and Carlisle and esme and avoiding edward as much as possible
-so Bella are anda staying with us?!?
Jane asked me with hope in her eyes
-I think I am.
I berkata cause I don’t have any other place to stay
-Bella anda can stay with us if anda like atau visit sometimes??
Esme berkata hope in her eyes too
-esme I don’t know …..um…maybe.
I smile at her and she touched my shoulder thanking me
Then Alice spoke
-oh Bella! Lets go and change your dress you’ve been sleeping in that thing for a 100 years!
Oh great Bella barbie again I sighed but she was right I should change as soon as possible
Alice clapped her hands and went to bring her bag
she came back in 1 sec and dragged me again back to my room when we got there she brought out a beautiful black dress
-wow its beautiful Alice!
-you like it?!
-yup!
-oh this is wounderful so try it on and come down ok??? I'm waiting!
She berkata and went outside I took off my old dress and took a hot mandi, shower and put my new dress on and thinked about a paire of black high heels and then wore them. I was brushing my haire when someone knocked on the door.
-come in.
I berkata thinking its Alice but someone else came in that I didn’t expected
-you look beautiful
Edward berkata and closed the door behind him
-what are anda doing here?
I was shocked he is such an bas…..
-Bella I came to apologize..
I cut him off
-there's no need to
-Bella I'm sorry I thought if I leave anda ,you will have a normal life…
-and I had a great life untill…….
Pain filled my eyes I really wanted to cry,….i really missed matt
-Bella don’t be sad
-I am sad! Edward!you always thinked about yourself anda never cared about what I wanted!have anda ever thought about talking to me and ask me if I wanted anda to leave?huh? atau anda didn’t care what I wanted and just left me bleeding!maybe I wanted to be with anda no matter what!i didn’t even care if I died the hari jasper lost it!because I would have died happy knowing anda loved me……….
I covered my eyes with my hands and started subbing edward came to comfort me but I flinched at his touch and he took a step back pain washing through his eyes.
-Bella I knew anda didn’t want me to leave so I made this choice myself I wanted anda to have a big family…
-and die!
I berkata anger in my voice
-no Bella at first that I met anda I wanted to ask Carlisle to change but that wasn’t faire to anda that would have been selfish of me
-havnt anda thought maybe I wanted what anda didn’t want?!
-Bella I'm sorry I made a mistake! I tried to track anda down but anda kept disappearing from place to place………
-Bella I cinta anda I cant leave without anda and these years that we were separate I thought I was dead1everyone tried to cheer me up but…….failed.
I snorted
-I guess Tanya didn’t
I berkata bitterly
-Bella I needed a distraction and rose was telling me stuff like I needed to forget anda live my life…….and all thease crap.im sorry Bella really I cant leavr if anda don’t take me back!
He cried and held my hand
"It was an early March morning, so early that the sky still had streaks of orange and pink in it."
Is it possible to fall in cinta with someone you’ve never met
Your only knowledge stemming from information you’ve seen atau read
Before I knew of his existence I would have stated no
Yet the first time I saw him my jantung begged to never let go
It isn’t rational
atau logical
Though cinta rarely is
I can’t make my jantung stop wishing that I held his
And I know it's stupid and silly to believe
In some kind of fairy tale
The perfect prince for me
But every time I see that smile
I can’t help but feel
That one hari we could share
A cinta that is real
Your only knowledge stemming from information you’ve seen atau read
Before I knew of his existence I would have stated no
Yet the first time I saw him my jantung begged to never let go
It isn’t rational
atau logical
Though cinta rarely is
I can’t make my jantung stop wishing that I held his
And I know it's stupid and silly to believe
In some kind of fairy tale
The perfect prince for me
But every time I see that smile
I can’t help but feel
That one hari we could share
A cinta that is real
this is aqua
ON STORMY CLOUDS
I’VE SEEN HIM SIT
THIS DARK malaikat FAIR
WITH FOLDED AND SHIMMERING
GOSSAMER WINGS
AND MOON BEAMS IN HIS HAIR
WITH BURNING EYES
TO EARTH HE SLIDES
SEEKING TO FEEL THE GROUND
THEN SPREAD HIS
RAVEN FEATHERED WINGS
CASTING HIS MAGICK SHADOW ‘ROUND
THIS malaikat TOUCH
IS A COMFORTS SONG
SOFT AS A VELVET CLOAK
AND WHEN HE REACHES
TO RIGHT THE WRONG
HIS WORDS ARE FEELINGS SPOKE
ON HOOF AND WING, I WATCHED HIM SAIL
MY DARK malaikat FAIR
TO SOME ARCANE ABODE
WE KNOW NOT WHERE
TILL HIS selanjutnya ASSIGNMENT
AND THE FUTURE HAS BEEN FORETOLD
FOR THE LAST FLIGHT
THIS DARK malaikat TAKES
IS A PIED-PIPERS GATHERING
FOR ALL THE SOULS HE’S TOUCHED
LISTENING TO THE SHADOWY
SONGS THEY’LL NOW SING
I’VE SEEN HIM SIT
THIS DARK malaikat FAIR
WITH FOLDED AND SHIMMERING
GOSSAMER WINGS
AND MOON BEAMS IN HIS HAIR
WITH BURNING EYES
TO EARTH HE SLIDES
SEEKING TO FEEL THE GROUND
THEN SPREAD HIS
RAVEN FEATHERED WINGS
CASTING HIS MAGICK SHADOW ‘ROUND
THIS malaikat TOUCH
IS A COMFORTS SONG
SOFT AS A VELVET CLOAK
AND WHEN HE REACHES
TO RIGHT THE WRONG
HIS WORDS ARE FEELINGS SPOKE
ON HOOF AND WING, I WATCHED HIM SAIL
MY DARK malaikat FAIR
TO SOME ARCANE ABODE
WE KNOW NOT WHERE
TILL HIS selanjutnya ASSIGNMENT
AND THE FUTURE HAS BEEN FORETOLD
FOR THE LAST FLIGHT
THIS DARK malaikat TAKES
IS A PIED-PIPERS GATHERING
FOR ALL THE SOULS HE’S TOUCHED
LISTENING TO THE SHADOWY
SONGS THEY’LL NOW SING
19 December
It's been almost a tahun since Freak died. For a while, people always used to say to me, "I'm sorry." I hated that. I yelled at them, "Feel sorry for Freak! I'm still alive!"
They shouldn't feel sorry for me. Freak taught me what it meant to walk tall. He tought me that remembering is only an invention of the mind, and if anda try hard enough, anda can remember anything. I try to remember everything Freak told me; and sometimes, it works. Then it slips away.
For a while after Freak died, I went back to being the critter hiding out in Down Under. Then one day, it hit me, and hard. If I had died, I wouldn't want Freak to do what I was doing. I would want him to continue Freak The Mighty.
And that made all the difference.
I try to make Freak proud; maybe I'm even succeeding. I just know that Freak changed the way I saw things, and I owe him that much; to keep Freak The Mighty alive.
-Max-
It's been almost a tahun since Freak died. For a while, people always used to say to me, "I'm sorry." I hated that. I yelled at them, "Feel sorry for Freak! I'm still alive!"
They shouldn't feel sorry for me. Freak taught me what it meant to walk tall. He tought me that remembering is only an invention of the mind, and if anda try hard enough, anda can remember anything. I try to remember everything Freak told me; and sometimes, it works. Then it slips away.
For a while after Freak died, I went back to being the critter hiding out in Down Under. Then one day, it hit me, and hard. If I had died, I wouldn't want Freak to do what I was doing. I would want him to continue Freak The Mighty.
And that made all the difference.
I try to make Freak proud; maybe I'm even succeeding. I just know that Freak changed the way I saw things, and I owe him that much; to keep Freak The Mighty alive.
-Max-
Me and Those
Ever noticed that in this life
Everyone wants anda to do something,
atau be something
That sometimes anda don’t want to be?
They are those!
anda know them!
anda probably have those in your house.
They are those who expect anda to take a path,
Even though,
Sometimes,
anda don’t want to take.
They are those who expect anda to be great,
Even though,
Sometimes,
anda prefer to be small and humble.
But do anda think,
For the slightest second,
That they care about that?
They don’t!
They are your parents,
Your grandparents,
Your Uncles and aunts,
That since anda were born,
Came up with a path for anda in life.
But know this,
And say it to yourself:
They are those, they matter,
But me is I,
And I’m the main character.
Artwork by me
Sitting right where anda are
anda have no claim on me
I know my own path
I am my own guide
anda are nothing to me
No matter how anda try
What do anda care?
If I'm not doing it right
I'm not following you
I know my own path
I am my own guide
anda don't know me
No matter how anda try
Why are anda here?
anda know I don't want you
I told anda to leave me
I am my own path
I know my own guide
anda can't mold me
No matter how anda try
Why do I feel compelled to write angsty poetry? I swear I'm not even that angsty. lol Oh well, I hope someone out there enjoys it.
