Critical Analysis of Twilight Article: Breaking Dawn Review

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posted by OCFan123

AHHHH! I just got my C.A.T. Medel! YAAAY! To celebrate, I decided to write an artikel about Breaking Dawn, since im not in school today!
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Okay. So I first got Breaking Dawn when I was a twi-hard fan, and I couldnt wait to read it! I was sure it would be great!
Boy, was I wrong.
The book was horrible. Just flat out horrible. I mean, I have read a lot of buku in my life than were not good, but this took the cake. Everything was just "blah"
I mean...characters were out of character, there was hardly even a plot, and I felt like I was membaca a cheap horror novel. I mean, through the whole thing I was waiting for a page that berkata "Heres the REALY story"! anda can guess that didnt happen...sadly.

Now, the beginning starts with Bella whining(what else is new?) about her new car. Eh, nothing special happened, but then we get to Chapter 3...
Now a girl on anda tube diposting 9 vidoes called "The Breaking Dawn Experince" and she mentioned this mistake.
Okay, so Bella is making pancake for Charlie, being the little "good house daughter" she is. BUT then a few sentence later it says that Charlie is scowling into his cereal bowl.
Um...wasnt she just making him pancakes?
First mistake in this book.

Anyway, the wedding was boring. Like "there were bunga everywere" and "Bella looked gorgeuous".
Wow, I felt like I was there!
So after that, nobody else matters. Not Charlie, Renne, atau ANYBODY else. Eh, there just thrown to the side. Bella has Edward now, thats all that matteres.
*sigh*

Anyway, they go on there honeymoon...
anda know? This actually amuses me lebih than it angers me. Because Stephanie Meyer should NEVER write sex ever again!
Ever.

Just membaca about Bella and Edward making love, made me feel like she was afraid to write it. Edward bites the pillows? Feathers are everywere? Bella has brusies all over her body? She wants him to make cinta to hr again? WTF?
The book started going way downhill from there.

But here is what ticks me off
Bella becomes pregenent.
...
...
...
Okay. Edward is a vampire. Vampire are suppose to be dead.
Meaning...
HE IS NOT SUPPOSED TO HAVE A FREAKING SPERM!

I could only stare at the page for like about a couple of minutes. Because Stephanie is breaking the rules that she made in her own world. It just doesnt make any sense. At all.
Anyway.

The book goes to Jacob POV! Which of course, I couldnt be lebih happy about, he's my favorit character in the books. And weren't his chapter titles hilarious? They all made me crack up!
Okay, so the book was starting to become good again (thank anda Jacob) but then we see Bella pregnent.

Just picturing how she looked in my head pregent made me dizzy...

BUT Edward, who is desperate for Bella not to die and wants to kill the deamon spawn of a baby, asks Jacob to have sex with Bella for she could have his baby instead.
No.
Just...no.
First of, the Edward we read about in the last 3 buku would NEVER do that! Never. And he should repsect Bella opinion, no go behind her back like that.
And Jacob agrees to do it.
What?
Oh, and Bella was actually touches oleh this.
No comment.

Also, character like Alice, Emmett, Jasper, made like the smallest gust apperence! Characters with great potential, also get throw to the side.
Its just so sad.

Anyway, I was LOVING the chemistry between Jacob and Leah? Who esle thinks they would have been perfect together?
Oh, and Seth rocked! Where the hell has he been the past three books?

Then, Bella gives birth.
I think I almost pucked.
It was literally the worst thing I have ever read! So gross. The baby breaks her ribs and spines, theres blood everywere(and I mean everywere)and Edward has to rip her stomach to get the deamon spawn baby out.
Nasty.
Oh, and the baby name is Rennesme.
?
Lets pretend that the name is not compltely weird, stupid, and unoriginal.

I thought it couldnt get any worse, but I was wrong. Again.
Jacob the character I LOVE, imprints on Rennesme!
Um...is Stephanie on crack? What was she thinking? She's a BABY! Its just wrong? Not to mention Jacobs character was WAY out of character after that.

So Bella is now a vampire. Yay. Great. Did we really need like three page of her looking into the mirrior, happy shes so gorgeous.
Its really sickning. Now shes just compltely vain.

Okay, so Rennesme is the perfect baby, Edward and Bella have so much sex that had like nothing to do with the book, blah blah blah.

Then we hear that the Volturi's are coming! I was so excited! FINALLY! Some action!
But we dont get a fight.
We get a confromation.
A stupid, pointless, confromation.
After that, I was thinking about going to Stephanie house and buring it down. Seriously.

So no battle. No fight. Nobody fights to get what they want. At all.
Biggest letdown in the whole book. And there was a lot.

Oh, and Edward calles Jacon "My son."
Who did not throw there book at the wall?
And, then we get the perfect fairy tale ending with the most chessiest line ever "And then we drifted into this perfect peice of our forever."
Gag. Me.
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Bottom line, it was just a huge letdown. One of the main reasons I started disliking the series.
Peace!

Phoebe_Gabriel, mispulka and 10 others like this

katiecain Pretty much totally agree with you. I liked the first chapters, the wedding and the honeymoon (except that bloody fade to black nonsense) but the rest... Eh. These are my biggest problems: -Bella was completely different in BD, even before she became a vampire. - Jacob imprinting on Renesmee. Apart from the fact it's completely ridiculous, what weird world does Stephenie live in, seriously? Oh and I agree, I would have loved Jacob and Leah getting together. - All during Bella's pregnancy, and most of Jacob's book, NOTHING happened! I loved Jacob's POV, but he had nothing to actually write about! - Like you, I was excited about the Volturi... Until they actually came. Build us up for something that isn't gonna happen why don't you Steph? - There's no way Edward could produce a child going by what Stephenie has said before BD was released. So yeah, lots of issues with it haha. And pretty much the same as yours XD But I actually liked it when Edward called Jacob his son, as cheesy as it was... I dunno, I just wanted them all to get along XD

phantomrose5 I LOVE YOU. Lol, not like that. But you hit the nail on the head! You mentioned EVERY SINGLE ONE of my reasons for hating BD (and then some), so I completely applaud you!!! There's really not much more I can say after such a fantabulous criticism like that. Except I would like to re-iterate the fact that, like, half the book involved the two having sex. Um, ew! Who really wants to read a novel where the main characters can't get over their lust for one another long enough to go about their lives and focus on something else for a change? And THANK YOU for being the first person I've ever seen who agrees that because Edward is dead, he cannot possibly produce sperm and make 'vampire children'. I was once a Twi-hard, I have to say. But after I read BD, I thought to myself, "Really? Did that SERIOUSLY just happen?" It was the worst ending I've ever had the misfortune to come upon. So I kind of let that sit for a while...then I tried to re-read the series and failed about twenty pages into the first book. And I don't even remember Edward calling Jacob his 'son' or whatever...that or else I tried so hard to forget it that I actually did. :) I'm pretty proud of myself, it hasn't been a year since I last read one of the books and I've already forgotten most of the storyline... Anyway, THANK YOU again for writing that review! Great job.

moo000 I agree with pretty much everything you said. Especially the part about Bella getting pregnant. They couldnt have even had sex seeing as he is dead and his heart does not beat and therefore does not pump blood to certain areas! Then when the baby is born in the most horrific and downright strange birthing scenes EVER, they give her that hidious name that I'm not even going to say. And then the whole againg really fast and then stopping thing; where the hell did that come from. I'm not going to even talk about the imprint. well done with the article and thanks.

ChocAttack266 Going by Meyer's explanation (read "cover-up for failing to notice this effing huge continuity fail in her own work"), "the venom acts as a substitute for sperm." If that were true, the egg wouldn't have even been fertilised. It would have been destroyed. Then Meyer, noticing the continuity fail in her explanation of a continuity fail, starts crapping on about "different kinds of venom" and "the sperm-venom is harmless". Come on, really? This is her going "Oh no, I'm running out of excuses for something that shouldn't have happened in the first place, but did cause I don't check my own work! I'll have to devise some completely bogus explanation, and hope it keeps my readers happy!" Too bad some people aren't as stupid as you'd hoped, Meyer, and they picked up on all of the mistakes. Next time, she should review the rules that she's made about her world before going ahead and breaking all of them, purely to give her characters another little moment of happiness with whipped cream and a cherry on top. I never noticed the cereal bowl bit; I was a bit too busy trying desperately to cleanse my mind of the entire series. Still am doing so, actually.