2x01: Acceptance

And the cool guest stars continue in season two with LL Cool J in the season opener. Seriously, how does this show manage these awesome guest stars in almost every single episode?

"Partypants" is Cuddy's password?

Wow, Cameron's hair is suddenly five shades lighter. I'm not sure how much I like it.

Especially love two of House's funnies as he brings Clarence in to the hospital: "Stop it, I'm getting turned on" as Stacy talks Lawyer, and then his bestest Scooby Doo impression as Cuddy catches up with them.

I love the mneumonic for a high anion gap. MUDPILES. Just went over that the other day, actually, with one of the other students on my rotation.

I'm just not interested in Foreman's back story. He just doesn't seem like as strong a character as some of the others. Just like Chase doesn't, either. I did enjoy House's instruction that Chase should be the one to go to the prison because he has "a prettier mouth".

Hysterical line: "I know you're friends with her, but there is a code. Bros before hos, man."

Atropine was also mentioned on CSI 1x04 Friends and Lovers with Heroes guest star Milo Ventimiglia--dry as a bone, mad as a hatter, red as a beet, blind as a bat.

Cameron's "unbelievable" was great, as was House's follow-up "I coulda hit that."

I want to see more drunk House! That was cute.

With him moving that much there's no way they would get any kind of a clear picture on the MRI.

Cameron's often pretty annoying, but this episode really got to me. I'm with House--she's way too nice for her own good, and it gets slightly obnoxious.

Cuddy's floral dress is awful. Awful. But I continue to love the fact that House wears random graphic tees with jeans, sneakers, and sport coats to work.

Halleluia by Rufus Wainwright is extremely overused. About as much as Iz's Over The Rainbow.

Decent episode all around, but nothing fantastically amazing. You know what I want to see now? A flashback episode showing how House found and hired his current team.

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2x02: Autopsy

Odd little episode. Every medical show needs the inspirational little girl with cancer episode, but... I don't know. This one seemed thin. I liked the amount of Wilson involvement we got, since I don't feel like we've seen him all that much lately, but the diagnosis and character didn't move me.

House being sick was funny. I'd like to commend Hugh on his American accent with nasal congestion. Tough, but well done. Unless Hugh was just sick this week, and they wrote in the cold to explain the fact that he can't talk properly. Either way, he does nicely in this episode.

Chase kissing Andie was kinda weird, while still being a little sweet, but mostly weird. I suppose if they were going to do that in this episode, they handled it well, and Jesse did nicely. I also like how much the whole situation gave the rest of the team the willies. Great reactions all around.

Funny line: "Tell that to all the hookers who won't kiss me on the mouth."

Funny moment: Wilson opening the menthol rub container for House.

Great exchange: "You have a cane, nobody even likes you!" "I'm not terminal. I'm merely pathetic. You wouldn't believe the crap people let me get away with."

Sasha Pieterse (Andie) has a lovely voice. Listening to her deliver her lines in this episode was wonderful.

I liked the light across House's eyes when Wilson tells him he's not going to discuss the specifics of the procedure with Andie. Very film noir. I just think it could have been used better in a different episode, because it didn't seem to fit in this one, about a sweet little girl.

The practice runs were cute, with House counting them out and dancing around the room like the situation isn't incredibly gruesome and grim.

Go Foreman! I'm glad he was the one who saw the clot as saved her. We haven't seen him do much in the way of heroics lately.

The song as Andie wakes up from her autopsy is lovely... I should look that up. It plays again as Andie is discharged. I remember it from some other show, or movie... What am I thinking of? Where have I heard it before?

I liked how disturbed Wilson was at the sight of House and his cold medicine and razor blade, doing lines of diphenhydramine.

Love that House went out and bought a motorbike. Awesome. The shots of his foot and the road speeding by were very pretty, as was the aerial shot of his bike racing through the countryside, but I didn't like the sideways shot of his face. Unnecessary, and kind of odd-looking.

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2x03: Humpty Dumpty

Man, Cuddy is horrible. The kid's having an asthma attack and sweating, and she sends him back up on the roof because she doesn't want her dinner party to be ruined? Seriously, woman, uncool.

Funny line: "Sorry, trouble concentrating. That tank top really absorbs moisture." And again: "Looks like the same old Cuddy.... same cleavage...?"

If I were Cuddy I wouldn't have stayed away. Go in there, visit the kid! Alfredo's younger brother Manny was completely correct--she is a bit of a bitch.

Great exchange: "I'm not breaking into my boss' house." "I'm your boss." "She's scarier than you are." "Rrrr. She's a woman. And relax, I'm coming with." I think House was actually a little insulted that Chase was more scared of Cuddy than him.

Finally, a scene between Wilson and Stacy. I liked that she knew she could wheedle the information she wanted out of him, and I'm glad he kind of put her in her place about being too curious and interested in House. Nice job looking out for your guy, Wilson.

House is ridiculous. He knows he's got Cameron after him, he flirts (in his own crude way) like crazy with Cuddy (and goes through her thongs), and then ends up still mostly in love with Stacy. All the while all three women are after him in some form or fashion, whether they admit it or not. Nice, House, you're such a pimp.

Funny exchange: "She uses super tampons. What does that mean?" "You two are just too nasty to each other not to have been...nasty." "Hey, I can be a jerk to people I haven't slept with. I'm just that good." Yes, but come on, it's obvious by this point (at least, by the end of this episode) that Cuddy and House had something at some point, whether it was a drunken night in her office or a party back in college. Now I can't wait for the story. I love the final line: "By the way, why does everyone think we've had sex? Think there could be something to it?" Ooh, House, you're evil. The two women are getting along nicely and you have to come in there and rub it in Cuddy's face about all the sex he used to have with Stacy, and then make Stacy bristle by insinuating he'd also had sex with Cuddy.

I love that House referred to the Amphotericin B as "the Amphoterrible". That's what I've always called it!

The way House twirls that cane is a great little character bit.

I'm quite impressed that House speaks Spanish, and almost even more impressed that he's managed to keep that fact from Cuddy for this long. The look on everyone's face when he asked Alfredo's mother where her son works on Saturday nights was fabulous, as was his explanation: "Honestly, I have no clue what I just said." "Why didn't you tell me you spoke Spanish?" "Because then they'd want to talk to me."

This is just the episode of interesting revelations about House. He can speak Spanish, he can juggle with one hand or two, and he is capable of saying something nice to someone. His odd little compliment of Cuddy at the end was weirdly sweet. Funny line: "Would the world be a better place if no one ever felt guilt? Would sure make sex better. You should have seen her in the last months of our relationship. Lotta guilt, lotta screaming."

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2x04: TB or Not TB

Continuing with the wonderful run of guest stars, this week we have Ron Livingston (Peter from Office Space). He actually really bothers me. Not the actor, just the character he always seems to play.

I can't decide whether Cameron's crush on Sebastian was cute or not. I'm glad she's able to crush on a cute patient after her thing for House, but

Augh, House's explanation of his allergic patient's cat problem was so wrong, and yet so incredibly funny. "Pills?" "You don't like to swallow? Not surprising. I'll give you a nasal spray." "Steroids? Is there something else you can give me?" "If you live by the river I've got a bag?"

I love that Sebastian wastes no time in accusing House of upping the speed of his tilt-table test. House's This Is Spinal Tap reference was great, too ("Does this go to eleven?"), as was the almost bored, matter-of-fact way Sebastian began listing his symptoms as he passed out: "Okay, I'm getting dizzy, I can't see, and I'm going to pass out."

First off, it was a HIPAA violation for Foreman to reveal the name of the patient he was talking about to Cecelia Carter after listing all of the other man's symptoms. Secondly, that woman is nasty. Seriously not a nice person. I could tell they were going to have trouble with her from the beginning.

Love the "compelling television" as House yells "That is not TB!" into the news camera.

House's apology to Cecelia Carter was funny. Tricky, tricky, tricky.

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2x05: Daddy's Boy

This week's guest star: Vicellous Shannon from 24 and CSI.

Love the team's apprehensive look at Wilson's white board list, as if they can't wrap their minds around someone else's bad handwriting up there besides House's. And the comments on his new leather jacket were hysterical. Love the jacket, though, looks very nice on you, Hugh.

Funny scene: "Two wheeled vehicles that travel 150 miles an hour don't really go well with crippled, irresponsible drug addicts." The childish revving of the bike's engine as Foreman tried to talk was amusing, as was the fact that Wilson attempted to insist motherly that House was going to take the bike back. Robert and Hugh did a great job (as per usual) with their exchange at the end of the scene, Wilson admitting his latest marriage was going badly (we've never even seen his wife on the show--I'm beginning to think of her like Maris), and House offering to drive, insinuating Wilson would have to ride on the back of his bike.

Mom? House has a mom? No way. House can't have parents. He was hatched, fully formed and graying with two days of stubble from a very large, spotted egg somewhere on the hospital grounds. Right?

Great line: "Who was that?" "Angelina Jolie. I call her 'Mom'. Who thinks that's sexy?"

Ooh, sneaky, Cameron. Conspiring with Wilson to bring House's parents along on their little date. And I was wondering why House needed a loan from Wilson to buy that bike--he's a brilliant doctor with no codependents, and he needs $5,000 to finance half his new bike? Plus, Wilson said this is the 4th time he's had to lend House money. I know there are brilliant doctors out there who are horrible with managing their own personal finance, but House just doesn't seem the type to not be a bit of a scrooge with his coin and look after it like crazy. Hoard it, even. Which is why I was relieved and pleasantly surprised by the fact that his borrowing from Wilson was some kind of a sick experiment with his friend's generosity. Wilson should've punched him after taking the check. How does he put up with this guy? And Wilson's retaliation: "I lied. I've been lying to you in increasing amounts ever since I told you you looked good unshaved a year ago. It's a little experiment, you know, see where you draw the line." sigh Brilliant.

I'm so proud of Cameron for setting up this squirm-fest around House--she and Wilson invited Cuddy? Lovely. I'm disappointed Chase and Foreman aren't going, though.

Who started the rumor that Cuddy's a transsexual? I think that would actually be me, not you, House. I believe I mentioned it in one of the first three episode reviews of the first season.

Oh, the "she's a doctor!" scene was priceless. And for the record, the kid was right, fungus is fungus. The same type of organism that infects feet (tinea pedis) infects the groin (tinea cruris), as well as the head (tinea capitis) and torso (tinea corporis). A topical azole will usually clear any of them up.

Based on the actors' ages, House's father, John, would have been 15 when House was born, while Mom!House, Blythe, would have been 21. I'm assuming they're pretending House is a little younger than Hugh (maybe 43 at this point in time?) and that John is a little older than the actor that plays him (about the same age as Mom!House most likely--around 67). This puts the Houses at 24 when they had their kid. That's okay with me. I have a big pet peeve about actors playing roles that obviously don't fit age relationships--like Angelina at 31 playing the mother of Colin Farrell at 30. Huh?

I'm so insanely curious for the whole backstory of why House hates his dad but still loves and can't lie to his mom. Hugh did a fantastic job with his delivery of "Thank you... for not eating." He sounded so defeated. This was worse than his deflation the first time we saw him with Stacy at the end of last season.

House's description of his mom hating confrontation seemed like an odd thing for House to be aware of to the point that it's one of his main descriptives when he thinks about her--must be hard, when he's one giant ball of walking confrontation. And I'm sure House was an insanely intelligent kid, and it must have been very hard for him to grow up with a military father who doesn't seem as enlightened as his son.

Nice ending: "You know what I figure is worse than watching your son become crippled? Watching him be miserable."

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2x06: Spin

Love the line: "She's still got a thing for you, making it impossible for her to deal. Makes perfect sense. Except for the pronouns." I love lines I have to kind of think about. :-)

Taraji Henson! Love her. She was so wonderful as Shug in Hustle and Flow.

Funny line: "Is there a light somewhere that goes on when I have food?" "Green for food, orange for beverage, and red for impure thoughts. That light burns out every two weeks."

Oh, I loved the cafeteria exchange between House and Mark. Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant! Followed up by the just-as-brilliant scene where House crashes Mark's therapy session. Nice.

Cuddy's using an online dating service? Oh dear.

And we're back to every patient getting the differential diagnosis of paraneoplastic syndrome.

Tom Lenk! Loved him on Buffy. So funny. And I can't tell you how hard I laughed at House shouting at Stacy about how he can get his rocks off any time he wants in front of the patient. Not get his rocks off in front of the patient, shouting in front of the patient... misplaced modifier, I know, Eggy, I know... At least I recognize them more now...

How can Stacy be so angry at House when she and her shiny new husband just dropped in and set up shop in his hospital after he saved Mark's life at their particular request? Plus, just a few weeks ago Stacy was in House's office telling him she wasn't over him! What's with this woman? Complete psycho.

I like Wilson's confession to Cameron that he's cheated--a lot--on his wives, and that telling them always hurts everyone involved. Robert, you're so sweet. And you're cute when you're conflicted.

And Cameron's hair is getting even lighter... I liked her better as a brunette. For no reason other than I have a die hard loyalty to my fellow dark-haired ladies, and tend to have a completely irrational pissy-ness toward brunettes who decide to be blondes. ...Okay, okay, I've done it, but everyone experiments in college, right? ;-)

Cameron and Wilson are starting to grow on me. I'm pretty sure their scene at the end there spawned a thousand fanfics. So, are we ever going to have a questionable little moment between the two of them? Oh, that would just drive House insane. It would be fabulous.

House looked in Stacy's therapy file? Bad, bad, bad. ....now I wanna know what it said, too!

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2x07: Hunting

House is reading Stacy's file aloud to Wilson? Uncool. But it's hysterical--borderline delightful--to watch House so incredibly happy about something. Funny line: "Meanwhile, she can't stop thinking about--I can't read that--is she obsessed with a grey horse? Or me?"

Love that House lives at 221B. I also love the expression "doc blocking me". I've had that experience. Just didn't have the appropriate term for it--until now. :-)

Funny exchange: "Let go of my cane before it becomes your new boyfriend." "Honey, I will marry it if you'll look at my file." "Congress says you can't, so let go."

Kalvin is Matthew John Armstrong, Ted from Heroes! He does great in this episode. Plus, it's interesting to see him clean shaven for once. He was always beard-boy on Heroes. I'm assuming since the actor is married to a girl named Ashley he's not actually gay, so I'd like to compliment him on a very nice performance. Unfortunately, straight guys often play homosexuality way over the top, or look uncomfortable in their own skin while they're doing it. Matthew was perfect.

House is awful--and completely brilliant--at playing Stacy in this episode. Wow. She didn't stand a chance. From his doing the dishes to not-so-subtle reminders of their previous sex life, to being adorable with that rat (by the way, naming it Steve McQueen was a stroke of genius--how can you resist a guy who names a rat and tries to give it health care?), House was masterful. Tsk, tsk, tsk. And Wilson thought he needed to give House advice on getting a girl... House knows how to seduce someone, it's just not the same way Wilson goes about it!

Funny line: "Trying to win Stacy back by killing an animal...how very caveman."

Funnier line: "What?" "Is this a bad time? Where are you?" "At your girlfriend's place. Ignore the moaning and squeaking."

Yikes. As a health care worker, let me just say how completely freaky it is knowing that at some point you're probably going to have somewhat questionable contact with someone who's HIV+. Not that any of us should deny care on those grounds, and we should always try to treat every patient exactly the same, but I'm not going to lie--the prospect of accidentally sticking myself freaks me out. Poor Cameron.

Eek. If I were House, I'd have pushed the toilet seat up with the ground-end of my cane, not the hand-end.

Funny exchange: "So you just...show up every time he's at physio?" "Course not. Also when he's at group therapy, or out to dinner with friends..."

House and Stacy were cute as they waited for Steve McQueen. And that was a close call there with Steve's arrival. Another 5 seconds and they would've kissed. Try explaining that to Mark--and Wilson (House's significant other in this scenario).

Okay, I understand they were trying to show that Cameron took drugs and was weird, but I think they over did it, just a tad. Her hair didn't need to be quite so cavewoman, the music didn't need to be so trippy, and the hat + bad hair even the next day were all too much. Her behavior was good enough to sell it, and with the dialogue, you didn't need the mountains of visual clues. That being said... Holy shagging doctors, Batman! Cameron and Chase slept together! And good lord, Cameron, when you jump someone, you really jump them. My only thought was, how does Chase justify having sex with a drugged-out, non-mentally-sound, possibly HIV+ coworker? I kind of wanted to punch him.

Whoa: "I'm not an idiot." "Course not. Who doesn't sleep with a drugged out colleague when they have the chance?" Foreman's face was priceless as he figured out what was going on, and shame on you, Chase, for trying to look confused.

Hugh took the punch well, and did a nice job socking the dad in the stomach with the cane. He walks a fine line between cripple and badass on this show.

Ugh, Stacy's awkward dabbing at House's face with a little cube of ice in a napkin was the dumbest thing I've ever seen. Well, no, that's not true, but it was pretty dumb. You hold ice on a wound to reduce swelling and numb it up a bit, you don't dab lightly at a bruise... This woman bothers me. The only reason I'm putting up with her is because I enjoy her crazy-effect on House.

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2x08: The Mistake

House and Wilson's coin-football match was cute. They're such eight year olds.

I really liked the flashback story feel this episode had in parts, especially the beginning of Chase's narrative when the action freezes and Stacy says, "Don't care about the Vicodin," and the bottle pops out of frame. Very cool.

Funny line: "Chase loves me. And isn't Turkish."

She's blonder... and I still don't like it...

Funny line I'm sure House/Wilson shippers went nuts over: "What are you hiding?" "I'm gay. Oh, that's not what you meant. That would explain a lot, though. No girlfriend, always with Wilson. My obsession with sneakers."

Ugh! Yet another Awful Cuddy Outfit.

Chase's dad died! Nice way of addressing that issue. Poor Chase.

Stacy needs to quit messing with House's head. "It's not all negative"? You can't say that kind of stuff to him and then get angry when he pursues you!

Ooh, House gets a babysitter! He's not going to play well with Foreman as his boss.

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2x09: Deception

Guest star: Cynthia Nixon! She looks nice with long blond hair. I like her this way compared to her Sex and the City look. She was a pretty decent guest star in this episode, although I wasn't overly impressed with any of this storyline.

I love House's reluctance to treat Anica at the OTB.

Foreman ordering House around was fantastic! The crack about Foreman not taking his parking space was great, as was House's reply: "Yeah, well, you'd also need my handicap placard. Bend over." And Foreman's ego swell was nicely done, too. I just didn't like that he stopped wearing his white coat. Like as House's boss he got to assume the role of arrogant ***. He was doing paperwork, getting things done on time, and running the department smoothly--why try to buck the system by not wearing the coat?

Did House really botch that lumbar puncture, or was he trying to prove a point by stressing her out and causing an attack? I tend to think he screwed up and he's trying to cover it by stressing that his actions confirm his diagnosis like he meant for all of this to happen.

House's "please?" face as he pseudo-begs Foreman to do his test was hysterical.

I don't get Foreman. Chase puts up with House for the glamor of his job, Cameron puts up with him because of a crush and her desire to save people, but why is Foreman still there? He hates House, never seems to get along with him, and doesn't tend to seem happy about his job in general. Why is he still there? It can't pay that well.

Oh, oh lord, the Jelly Patient. Creepy. And hysterical. "Okay, we have a neurological problem here." "There's something wrong with my brain?" "Oh yeah." [...] "You probably shouldn't have sex for awhile." "How long?" "On an evolutionary basis, I'd say never."

The trip on House's bike to Anica's apartment was hilarious! There was a time Cameron would've paid money to ride on the back of his bike with her arms around his waist. Cameron/House shippers rejoice! But--problem is, Cameron didn't seem excessively happy about the situation. So, House/Cameron shippers can relax again.

Loved House's compliments of the lab tech to get her to attempt the tests on the small amount of blood. "I could try to look like Salma Hayek, but that's not going to make it happen." "You may not have Salma's ***, but she doesn't have your eyes."

Funny little scene: "Dr. Wilson--can I talk to you in confidence?" "Sure." "It's about House." "Then, no.... Fine! I won't say anything." "Do you think there's any way House would take me seriously as his boss?" "Where is this coming from? Did Cuddy say something?" "We talked, she intimated." "And you want my advice on how to usurp him? It's very ancient Rome--you'll need a toga, of course. A sword...."

I'm so freaked out by House's injection of Anica on the park bench in the snow. He's psychotic. It worked for the episode, but his tactics seriously make me uncomfortable.

Who does Foreman think he is, accepting an offer from Cuddy that she hadn't made yet?

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2x10: Failure To Communicate

I loved the idea of the team trying to solve something without House. And the case was interesting enough, but it still wasn't incredibly great.

How does Stacy's later flight preclude her from having dinner with House?

Loved Chase's "everybody lies" from his position in House's chair, while playing with that ball in a decidedly House-like fashion.

The phone call between House and Wilson was cute, especially the "hi honey" and references to "the kids". The kid bothering House was great, too, tossing the ball at the back of House's chair, crawling around underneath him. I love that he stole the kid's ball!

That odd little hat Foreman was wearing during the Breaking-and-Entering portion of this evening's programme rubbed me the wrong way.

House's fretting over why Stacy wasn't wearing her crucifix was entertaining. I think this was the best part of the episode. Most character-driven and it advanced their relationship and House's personality more than anything else. The offer of a shared hotel room was well-handled by both parties. House looked sheepish and awkward, but grateful, and Stacy was adultly cautious. And Stacy/House shippers jumped on sofas and flailed their arms and squealed.

...And then once the oh-so-adorable curry metaphor was completed and Stacy and House kissed, the shippers all started screaming at the top of their lungs and grinning like idiots. They are so cute together! Sela Ward's frustration as the phone rang, interrupting the kiss was pitch-perfect, and the following phone call was hysterical, House trying to concentrate on a diagnosis while Stacy tugged at his clothing, and the poor woman ending up twirling his cane on the bed in frustration while he played word games with his underlings. Fantastic all around.

House wrote on the wall of the airport? I'm pretty sure no airport is ever that empty, and I'm thinking they don't generally let people scribble stuff on the walls, no matter how few travelers there are in the terminal.

Why didn't they think that it could be a problem with telling secrets in front of the wife sooner? I'm sure I wasn't the only audience member that had it figured out immediately.

Loved House's explanation of the patient while he looked at Stacy in the airport: "...which was fine... until you fell in love. And you wanted that life. And you hear that there's a surgical cure--give the woman you love the life she wants. All you have to do is change."

Nice line to go right before the final scene with House and Stacy: "She'll be back. Give her time to miss you."

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2x11: Need To Know

Famous guest stars! Yet again. The lovely Julie Warner (Nip/Tuck, Scrubs, Tommy Boy, Flatliners), Elle Fanning (Deja Vu, Babel, Because of Winn Dixie), and the oh-so-cute Edward Kerr, who played Lt. Brody on SeaQuest DSV.

Hysterical beginning of the episode: "He's actually on time." "Six minutes early." "Something's happened." "I'm on it." Robert, I love you. Your delivery is always fantastic. You make your dialogue so much funnier just by the way you say it--which, I suppose, is exactly what an actor is supposed to do.

Kiss and tell! House, naughty boy.

Wilson's accusation tantrum in Stacy's office was pretty sweet. It was well done, Robert did well, and I loved that Wilson was so protective of House. I also liked that Stacy had no idea how badly House had taken their breakup.

Funny line: "I know you're in there. I can hear you caring."

Wilson rolling for a patient? Cute.

House and the balloon animal? Yeah, that seems about right. I'm just not surprised by the random things it turns out House can do these days.

Fantastic delivery: "You love me more." And I'm not sure whether I'm proud of or disappointed in House for sleeping with Stacy again. I guess I'm both.

Kudos to House for figuring out how to get a sample from Cameron. Very nice.

I liked the scene on the roof between House and Stacy (Hugh broke my heart--he was so good), but I hated the purple CGI sky they popped in the background. Looked fake and cheesy.

Oh, poor Mark, wheeling around begging House to explain what's happening in his marriage, unaware that House is the cause of all of it. What a position to be in. I felt so bad for Mark as he lurched up the stairs and clung to House. This guy is at the end of his rope, and House is being an *** and trying to run away from the guy up a flight of stairs. Too bad he's in such bad shape that he can't get up the stairs quick enough either! I still can't believe he left Mark in the stairwell, though. That was cold.

Loved Cuddy's southern-imitation of Stacy.

Glad House broke it off and insisted Stacy go home with Mark. Now, who actually broke it off the first time?

I liked House and Wilson's fight on the roof. I'm proud of Wilson for yelling at House without a hint of jest. People tell House he's an *** all the time, but I think the only time he really hears it is when Wilson yells it at him.

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2x12: Distractions

I wasn't too terribly enthralled by this episode. No, let me take that back--I liked House's migraine. But we'll get to that.

Funny line: "We said patient's brain, not pregnant woman's uterus. Although they do sound alike."

I enjoyed House's obsession with Dr. Weber, especially his attempt at listening to his lecture incognito. Wilson's peanut gallery comments were awesome, interjected between House's questions and Weber's answers. "Who are you?" "Just someone in desperate need of a hobby..." and "I know your math skills. They blow." "Touche..." and finally, the topper: "Yeah, the guy running Slurp and Gulp tells me it's the best." "Get a hooker. Anything."

Interesting to know that House got kicked out of school for cheating. So, apparently, he's been morally bankrupt for years. Despite his total genius status, he needed to cheat? Interesting. I also cannot express how much I adore that he re-named his tattle-tale Von Lieberman because it sounds, "way eviler."

So, House's self induced migraine... This guy is off his rocker. Completely lost it. So set on revenge that he's willing to self-induce incredible pain to finish a grudge from 20 years ago. I loved the odd depth effect they gave the shot of House as the migraine sets in, and the great half-smile, half-grimace as his pain mixes with the gratification of being right. His pathetic crouch under the table in the workroom was cute, as was the fact that he ended up spending the night sleeping on the office floor. I also liked that for the first time in House history, something (in this case, pain) prevented him from finishing his metaphor and trusting someone else (Foreman) to continue his thought. He must be really hurting.

Maggots don't work like that. You put them on as little itty bitty things that you can barely see, and after several hours, they get to be that big.

Love Wilson's torture of House during the migraine, with bright lights, shouting, dropping the silverware into the sink, and slamming of doors. "Typical lose-lose situation--very you."

House's LSD trip in the shower was pretty funny. Seeing the colors and sounds in the drop of water was hysterical, as was the choice of music for the scene.

I wonder how long Hugh worked on his limp before shooting started for the series. He's very consistent, especially so in this episode, where he hobbles around quite a bit without his cane.

Whoa... House took Wilson's advice and got a hooker!

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2x13: Skin Deep

This is another one of those awesome episodes I put up there on my Top list. So far we have 1x11, 1x21, and 2x13. I was worried we weren't going to get any more fabulous ones, but I guess they only come along twice a season. So I'll be looking for the next incredibly impressive one in another 9 episodes or so.

I adore the song that plays after the credits and again at the end, Desire, by Ryan Adams. Hugh did a great job looking twisted as he wakes up to increasing leg pain. Nicely done.

Alex is 15? Good lord, I've got several years on her, and I don't look like that yet... Then again, truth be told, the actress playing her, Cameron Richardson, was 27. Doesn't make me feel so bad. Love how House goes Creepy Old Man on her after their first meeting.

Funny moment: "No, I'm fine," after House stumbles into the counter and no-one moves to help him.

House's assumption and discussion of Alex's sexual abuse was funny and icky at the same time. Very interestingly played. His confrontation of the father in the bathroom was chilling, but even more so was Alex's confession that she did it on purpose to get away with stuff. Yikes.

Foreman's really begun to bother me lately. I think Omar is the weak link in the acting chain on this show.

I think my very favorite House/Wilson moment so far occurs in this episode. "House. This is God." "Look, I'm a little busy right now. Not supposed to talk during these things. Got time Thursday?" "Let me check. Aw, I got a plague. What about Friday?" "I'll have to check with Cameron." "Aw, dammit! She always wants to know why bad things happen. Like I'm going to come up with a new answer this time." "House!" "Quick, God, smite the evil witch!" "Are you sitting on evidence your patient was sexually abused by her father?" "God, why have you forsaken me..."

...Followed closely by the discussion afterwards as Wilson accuses House of having a psych issue that is manifesting as leg pain since Stacy left, to which House replies by smacking him really hard in the leg with his cane and saying, "Aw, you miss Stacy, too?" How does Wilson put up with this guy?

Oh, lord, it's paraneoplastic syndrome again...

Poor House, resorting to asking Cuddy for morphine injections. He must really be desperate. I really liked how humbly he presented himself to her when he first walked in her door, admitting he doesn't want his team to know how much pain he's in, lest he lose some of their respect and obedience. Even Wilson's deserted him on this subject. Cuddy's face when House starts to undo his pants is hysterical, but the moment is short lived when we get our first glimpse of House's scarred thigh. Ouch. Hugh does a great job here, looking close to tears as he pleads, "What about this? Is this all in my head? Because I could swear I remember a thigh muscle being there!"

She's a he? Huh. Didn't see that one coming. And, as usual, I can't decide whether House's uncaring handling of the situation was hysterical or over-the-top rude. I'm going to go with both. "Put your clothes back on... We're going to cut your balls off. Then you'll be fine."

Nice one, Cuddy. I like the sneaky way she got House to admit there was a psych component to his pain. He's constantly making a fool of her and tricking her into something, it was nice to see her pull one over on him and make him the chump this time.

I do love a man who can play the piano. Now, it would be even better if it were the guitar.

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2x14: Sex Kills

Greg Grunberg! I love this guy. If you've read my reviews of Heroes, and thoughts on Lost and Alias, you know I'm a big fan of him. He's so awesome. We also have Keri Lynn Pratt playing Amy (we've seen her on CSI, Bones, Veronica Mars, ER, That 70s Show, Law and Order SVU, Nip/Tuck, 7th Heaven, Brothers and Sisters, Boston Public, Jack and Bobby, and apparently every other TV show in the past 10 years). And last but not least, we've got Adam Busch as Tony, who played Warren on BtVS.

Wow, Greg didn't show up until 20 minutes into the episode. And that was the minute that things got interesting. I was slightly intrigued by the Wilson-and-his-wife storyline, but with nothing more than House's assumptions, the conversations and verbal ping-pong had less weight.

And the doctor goes down! Nice shot, Greg. I always seem to enjoy watching patients hit House. And good lord, Greg is amazing. I can't say this enough in this review.

I liked House's death laugh. I also like the idea of them diagnosing and curing a dead woman. Very different, very interesting.

Oh, my heart breaks for Wilson as he asks House if he's considered that "I might be going through something that I need to have an actual conversation about?" And House just walks away? Poor Wilson.

Do you think Hugh could twirl that cane like that before he was cast as House, or did he learn during the course of filming?

Can't say it enough... Love you, Greg. Such a great tearful performance.

Ooh, that's gotta suck, Wilson--his wife gave him a taste of his own medicine! Poor guy. I wonder how long it's going to take for House to get totally and completely fed up with his best friend camping out on his couch?

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2x15: Clueless

Wow, the annoyance started really fast. One night and House is done. The hair dryer was great, as was the cooking channel and stuffed pepper.

Guest star of the week: Samantha Mathis. Wanna see more? Check out American Psycho, Broken Arrow, American President, Little Women, and lots of others.

I loved the juggling: "What, no applause?"

House insisting Cameron has to be in the men's room as he pees was pretty funny. And a law suit waiting to happen.

Things House has TiVo'd: The O.C., Spongebob, and Blackadder (which is funny because it's a British show starring none other than Hugh Laurie).

The macadamia pancakes and stolen salad were hysterical. Maybe he's not so ready to give Wilson up.

House/Wilson shippers probably went nuts there in the end when House erases the phone message for Wilson while the song in the background plays: Love and Happiness by Al Green. Aw, so sweet, House trying to trick his new roommate into sticking around.

I liked the little glimpse of House's past, and I liked his interaction with Wilson through the whole episode, but other than that, this was the best installment that I have nothing to say about. If that makes sense.

Hmm. $20 in her pants waistband? Sexy.

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2x16: Safe

Michelle Trachtenberg! How ya doin', Dawn? I love your hair... can you teach mine to do that? Please?

If I were Wilson, I'd kill House. Someone would just find his body in the river. The dishes in the oven were a pretty funny trick, though. But after the stethoscope-on-the-doorknob fiasco, I'm surprised Wilson didn't disembowel him. (Wilson's ew-gross face after the masturbation innuendo was fantastic. In fact, all of FranticallyAnnoyed!Wilson's mannerisms are wonderful.)

I want my white coat tailored like Cameron's.

When is coma-man going to wake up? Or get sick? I wanna see House save coma-man's life.

Oh, House... "There's a reason they call it a white board. Sorry, not my rule." "[...] You wanna give me that black marker?"

Hey, she has a steppage gait! I love it when they talk "gait"... ;-)

The cane fight with Foreman in the elevator was funny, but seriously, House's tactics make me crazy.

And speaking of canes, the filing of House's was lovely. Go Wilson.

As cute as the matching movement was, both boys crossing their legs on the coffee table in front of the TV, House wouldn't have been able to lift his right leg so smoothly to do that.

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2x17: All In

We open with one of my favorite Diana Krall songs, 'Deed I Do. So cute. I love her Live From Paris CD.

I think House, Wilson, and Cuddy playing poker is the greatest thing I've seen in awhile. House, whose cane is not phallic enough, is toying with a big unlit cigar in a very oral-fixation-esque manner, while Cuddy (in a rare, feminine moment) looks fantastic with her hair curled and in an amazing teal dress. The neckline of which, obviously, is used as a joke at some point by House. I would expect nothing less. My favorite part of the whole thing was, though, that House walked away from a smoker of a winning hand to play with Cuddy's patient puzzle, without holding it over anyone or making a big deal about it. This guy really feels a stronger pull toward fixing people than making fun of or humiliating them. This is an important thing to remind us of every once in awhile, since the majority of the time House is a Grade A ***.

Chase's I'm-a-hot-Aussie-so-I-hit-on-women-with-sh­ark­-st­ori­es bit was cliche, but cute. As was his preoccupation with getting back to her all night after being kidnapped by House for the case. House's kidnapping was fantastic, though: "Hey! How's that anal fissure? Did it heal yet, or is it still draining? Oh! I'm sorry. I didn't realize you'd come back for seconds. I figured after that girl in the stairwell, you'd be done for the night." "He's joking." "No Adam's apple, small hands, no surprises this time." "I'll, uh... see you later."

Love Cameron's dress on her, very Cameron, with the pinkness, the straplessness, the over-all sweet-but-grown-up princess feel to it. For the record, it's nothing I'd ever wear. And I adored how when House finally turned around and saw her in it he completely burbled to a halt, and was only able to manage, "...she wouldn't have assigned it to me if she didn't, and--k'haaaaaaawwwww... ...What were we talking about?" Very sweet. As was Cameron's cute little silent "thank you for the compliment" face.

The coded House-Wilson conversation about Cuddy and the current hand of cards was hysterical ("The chicken is still indicatively square.") and I love that House played him so badly into making him lose enough to Cuddy to keep her in the game and playing. Fabulous. House at his puckish best.

Ian bothered me. I know you can't expect kids to act like they've been onstage for 20 years, but this kid was mostly just kind of obnoxious.

I loved that House forcefully broke into the cafe, using his new cane to bash open the padlock. BTW, not a very effective padlock.

Toenail polish??

I love Wilson's warning to House, mostly because this line could have been said and said well in every single episode up until this point, and fit perfectly. "You know, obsession is dangerous."

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2x18: Sleeping Dogs Lie

Jayma Mays! Charlie from Ugly Betty and Charlie from Heroes. I'm surprised she's playing "Hannah" here... She just has the cutest speaking voice. I could listen to her drawl lines all day.

I love the look on House's face when Cuddy says, "Oh, give me some credit. I know what gets you off. She took the pills to try to sleep, not kill herself."

I think I'd still donate part of my liver to a significant other that was leaving me. If I still loved the person, and could save their life, I'd donate.

I really liked this episode. For some reason it resonated with me like crazy. I really felt for Max, I really felt for Hannah, I was angry at Foreman, and fed up with Cameron.

House speaks Mandarin? ...Okay, yeah, I'm alright with that.

The plague. Wow. Cool. I like it. When are they going to have a patient with Ebola? Anthrax?

Cameron has no butt. None at all. Check out her profile shot around 41:30 or so. I mean, I have no butt, but I've got more then she does.

Foreman, you're turning into House. This slow process of asinine-ation makes me want to punch you.

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2x19: House vs. God

Guest star alert! Thomas Dekker, aka John Connor from Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, and Zack from Heroes. I'm not wholly impressed with his performance here, though. I believed his other two roles much more.
Poor Wilson! House, let your best friend play poker. Especially after you stuck him in The Never-Ending Poker Game Of Death And Deception with Cuddy during the benefit. He's earned a place at your table.

This seems to be the second half of 1x05 Damned If You Do. More religion jokes from House... Not that I'm really complaining. They're just as funny as the rest of his jokes!

Funny line: "They could build monuments to your self-centeredness." I always love a good House/Wilson banter. "Climb out of your holes, people!"

Another funny line: "God would probably want you to take the stick out of your butt and get over this."

Whoa... "God wants you to invite Dr. Wilson to your poker game." I had been drifting off a little bit (because it's late, not because I'm bored), but this line snapped me right back awake again. And one other thought--House knows enough other guys that he has a poker night? I thought he had no friends other than Wilson? Is this going to end up really sad, where he's made up an imaginary poker night just so he could not invite Wilson to something to mess with him?

Funny line: "This is fun, it's like Password. Keep talking; I'll jump in when I get a clue what the hell you're talking about." Does Wilson do anything other than eat? House accosts him as he's eating in the cafeteria, and two scenes later House jumps him again in the checkout line at the cafeteria, buying more food. Wilson, binge eating is not the solution to your depression over not getting invited to House's poker game.

Wow. I was completely expecting the poker game to be fake. I'm somewhat impressed that House knows people he can convince to come to his apartment to spend an evening with him. Even if they are his dry cleaner, accountant, and random guy from the bus stop.

Oh, ouch. House, that's pretty cold and cruel, even for you. Outing Wilson's affair with Grace in front of a bunch of guys he doesn't even know. Still, I was sure Wilson had more sense than to pull a Cameron and shack up with a terminal patient. My heart just broke for him when he realized House was on to him, and all he said was "don't," in that sad, pleading, puppy-dog-eyes way he has. How he didn't divorce House right then and there is beyond me. Well, divorce, or stab through the eye with a sharpened pretzel.

"But you... you eat neediness." "Lucky for you." Ah, yes, that's always the answer. Of course that's why House and Wilson are still married. Wilson likes the brokenness of his friend. The argument on the street was well done by both parties, and I loved the fact that the fight didn't seem to affect their willingness to help one another even a little bit. Funny line: "You do know I don't actually have magical powers?"

Is that true? Some doctor years ago injected a woman with cancer with rabies? And it worked? "I have no idea why he did that, but..." Very funny. This all means, of course, that Grace was given herpes by a 15 year old, and if Wilson is sleeping with her, then he could have it, too. See, Wilson? This is karma. Sleep with a patient, get an STD.

Nice Blues Brothers reference: "I'm on a mission from God."

Okay episode, not amazing, but pretty good. I liked the Wilson/House storyline.

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2x20: Euphoria 1

Whoa, awesome opening. Very cool. Slow motion bullets are always neat.

I love that House flat out admitted, with no pretense or sarcasm, "That is just so cool that you know that," when Foreman explained how he knew the bullet was ferromagnetic.

House capping a bullet in the dead man's *** in the morgue was great. Hysterical. Had me laughing aloud. He shot a dead guy! And then took out an entire MRI machine by sticking dead-times-two guy in it! Oh, lord, funny, funny, funny...

While Omar Epps usually really bothers me, I thought he did really well in this episode, gradually and effectively getting more and more off-the-wall. He was really quite subtle with it in the beginning, and his choked up conversation with the cop was really emotional. Nice job.

Funny line: "Get out of my temporal lobe, House."

It was great to see how much House cared that Foreman was infected with something. Even if he refuses to show it in front of his team, Foreman's sickness is really eating away at House.

Cryptococcus neoformans! I'd like to state for the record that any first year med student worth their salt and who didn't skip class the day they went over fungus in microbiology should have diagnosed that the minute Foreman stepped out onto that patio and the pigeon flew at him. It's one of those questions on the final you don't have to think about. regardless of the other symptoms in the sample history you're given, if "pigeon" in is in the question, pick "cryptococcus neoformans". It'll be the right answer. But in true House fashion, I was wrong. And I thought I was so damn smart this time.

Ooh, to be continued...

2x21: Euphoria 2

Nice Jack Bauer reference, House. Keeping the advertisements in the FOX family, I see?

And Foreman slips further into his illness... So now we've had Cameron possibly get HIV, Foreman has this crazy something, but we haven't seen House or Chase in danger... They're next. Or maybe they won't put Chase at risk... I don't think I'd be too terribly engaged in that kind of episode. I'm just not sure I'd care as much.

He's using Steve McQueen? Poor little lab rat. House is ready to kill him? He was unwilling before...

Omar's still impressing me... Very nice. His performance in these two episodes outshines any of his others so far. His tearful conversation with his dad was heartwrenching.

Funny fight: "I'd rather be disabled than dead." "Right, because I make it look oh-so-sexy." No comment. :-)

Wow, Cameron was cold. She wouldn't forgive Foreman! The man's dying, but she wouldn't forgive him! He really pissed her off to make her this objective. She's borderline uncaring there... Glad she finally accepted his apology before he went under. And I loved the way she told off Cuddy.

Ooh, this should be interesting... The lasting effects of the brain biopsy should make Foreman's character a little more compelling from now on. Maybe someone would remove a piece of Chase's brain, too.

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2x22: Forever

Fake out! Not the dad with the stomach flu, it's the mom!

I love how defensive and--dare I say it?--jealous House got when Wilson intimated Cuddy could have a thing for him.

Poor Chase... And Foreman is back to not being my favorite character. I'm not sure I'm going to like this episode.

House is going through Cuddy's trash? That dinner conversation was so awkward... Not a Cuddy fan, not a fan at all.

Funny line: "Friends divvied up... oddly she didn't fight me for House."

The murderous mommy storyline was interesting--I really liked the eventual diagnosis and how they got there. I liked the patient case in this episode a lot more than the leads' personal storylines. Although House's increasingly rude comments to Foreman were pretty funny, the best moment being House's frantic wail and plea for Foreman to argue with him.

Funny line: "Zesty bod... I think it's great you can look past the fact that she's the devil."

As sad as it is to have Mikey die, I'm glad to see they're not afraid to write a patient death. I was getting a little bored with them always finding the right answer in time to save everyone. I want to see more episodes where they figure it out, but not in time to do anything, possibly even post-mortem. Just to add to the realism a little--you can't save everyone, and sometimes there are incurable diseases even if you do recognize what they are immediately.

Cuddy insists she's a woman... I beg to differ. I still think she's a man.

House is so cruel, going after Cuddy about her desire for kids. At least he didn't tell Wilson.

Hillary Tuck, who played Kara in this episode, reminds me vaguely of Emilie de Ravin (Claire on Lost).

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2x23: Who's Your Daddy?

Poor House. I'm a sucker for that limp. I feel so bad for him! What made it so bad he's busting out the morphine? And since when does he have his own supply? Is this since the Cuddy-placebo incident?

Cuddy! Put a grown-up shirt on that doesn't make you look like a two dollar hooker.

Where does House know this guy from? I know a metric ton of exposition straight out of the gate is never fun for anyone, but we could get a little more in the first third of the episode, don't you think?

Whoa. One of the scarier episodes, visually. The bloated floater of a mother, House's dripping face... Yikes. And I'm watching this before bedtime. Possibly not a smart decision.

House and Cuddy's injection scene was hysterical.

I loved the whole team pacing the hallway as they follow House.

Oh, evil House. Getting with his friend's girlfriend in order to give him a reason to break up with her? That's low. And how in the world is he still friends with House after that? Why do people give this man so many chances? I do like that it was that story that made Wilson lose his appetite.

Oh good lord, House found 613. Cuddy slamming the drawer into House at the desk was hilarious, as was 613's creepy little laugh-snort.

Ingrid! Very funny little scene Wilson stumbled in on.

Mmmm... Not the best, not the worst. It took me too long to figure out exactly who was lying to who about what in the paternity and location department.

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2x24: No Reason

As I began to watch this episode, I wrote, "We haven't had an amazing personal House episode in awhile and we're due. This is the season finale, so I'm guessing this one's going to be it." Literally 10 seconds later, House gets shot. Yep. This one's going to be good.

Guest star shooter: Elias Koteas from (how appropriate) Shooter, Zodiac, Fallen, Gattaca, and my very favorite, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. He was Casey! Now he's got no hair...

This episode had me going... I couldn't tell where the hallucinations/dreams/alternate reality split started. I'm very gullible. Initially, I wrote: "Aw. I wanted to see the battle as they took down Jack and rushed to stabilize House and get him to (presumably) the ER. That's half the fun! They skipped over all the drama!" And then I finally get it in the last minute of the episode. Thank you!

It was the two of them getting put in the same ICU room that first made me suspicious of the reality of the situation. Otherwise, who in their right mind would put House in the same room as the guy who shot him? There are no other rooms? This would have been the most ridiculous plot device.

Ew, oh that bulging eye was gross. A lot of people think my chosen field of medicine is nasty, but I could never be an ophthalmologist. Clinically, eyes just give me the willies.

I love that they had to chain House to his bed. And even better was his escape to the Mexican food place, still (I love it) in his hospital gown. House's imitations of the team were also great. I don't even mind that it was a hallucination.

I want Cameron's all-black outfit and sunglasses.

Very interesting that in House's psyche Cuddy's still really into treating House behind his back. I wonder if he's ever going to get over the fact that she and Stacy took those quads from his right thigh without his permission.

House's screaming match with Wilson and Cuddy was well done, but not perfect. I didn't like the swinging camera moves so much, and I think Hugh has done better work. But not often. This was a 9/10 for him. The punch was well done by both parties, though, the puncher and punchee. And I'm glad that was a hallucination.

Okay, in an episode that began with a moment that had much more sexual tension in it than most episodes of House (Cameron stopping House in the hall after he basically dared her to touch him), House's demonstration of surgical precision by robotically stroking her face and playing with the buttons on her shirt definitely counts as one of the biggest, bestest Hameron ship moments thus far.

Oh! He hallucinated Jack's wife as Tongue Dude's wife. There's the connection.

Awesome episode. Very good. So, the list of Best House Episodes so far now reads: 1x11, 1x21, 2x13, and 2x24.

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