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Do anda envy anyone anda know?

Yes, i think I've always been envious of my twin sister, but I've only been able to deduce that emotion recently.
It probably sounds strange for a guy to feel jealous of his sister, but it can't be helped. Ever since i was born, I've always been treated like a freak because of the birthmark on my face, while my perfectly normal sister was loved oleh everyone around her.
We used to look and act allot alike, but because of the treatment i received from an early age, I've become so introverted and i stopped taking care of myself, making the ridicule worse.
My sister has always been treated better oleh kids, family, and even complete strangers. To them i'm nothing but her wierd, ugly brother that never talks.
I feel as if my sister has everything that was denied from me, and yet she complains of being unhappy. Whenever i hear her express such disregard for her blessings, i just get this burning sensation throughout my body, and now i can't even look at her without thinking malevolent thoughts.
I feel so horrible because of it. I cinta my sister lebih than anything in the world and it makes me feel so guilty to think that I've been hating her all this time when she's done nothing but try to be a good friend in the past.

I'm sorry for spouting off like this, but i just want some reassurance that i'm not the only one that has ever felt this way about another person.

MasterOfFear posted lebih dari setahun yang lalu

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kittyluvaxoxo said:

Not really... im happy the way I am. Sure, some people in this world are bound to be smarter atau better than me in some sort of way... but to tell anda the truth i really don't care about that sort of thing.

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r-pattz said:

...No.

I just don't give a shit about most other people. (And the handful I do care about I don't envy; I just like atau cinta them.) I don't pay attention to people; people don't pay attention to me. I just don't give a shit. It's a lovely little system.

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I wish i could be able to feel such indifference to most people. Its easier to make your own decisions without worrying how it will harm the people that might care about you.

MasterOfFear posted lebih dari setahun yang lalu

Eh. Indifference isn't necessarily a good thing. Actually, it scares me, sometimes, that I don't feel much. Yeah, it's easier, but easier isn't always better.

r-pattz posted lebih dari setahun yang lalu

LinaHarrow said:

I envy a lot of people.
I envy the people who haven't had to grow up much faster than they should have.
I envy the people who's family doesn't have any lebih problems than normal, expected problems such as "kid" vs. "parent".
I envy the people that have friends off the internet, close friends they can tell anything too.
I envy the people who don't have to worry about anything lebih than grades, money, and what to wear tommorrow.
I know a lot of people have it worse off than me, I've met some of them. But a lot of people have it better as well. I'm not complaining, as backwards as it is, I'm almost happy with my situation. I'm still thankful for the impact that what I've been through has had on me. I think it's helped define me, give me my personality, and whatever ambition I have.

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