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 No. No I don't, Ross.
No. No I don't, Ross.
1. Ally Dawson
I hate Ally! For starters Laura Marano who plays Ally is a hopeless wannabe actress. Her character is ugly, boring, and has absolutely NO social life which makes her dead dull. She makes me want to barf and then fall asleep. Plus she is very thick letting Austin deceive her and then become his BFF and musik partner! She can't defend herself and is super socially awkward. Why would she keep menulis for Austin, even though he used her. Not to mention, she wears the exact same friggin' clothes in every episode, and they're all ugly just like her (on the both the inside AND the outside)....
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posted by karpach_13
Product Warnings:

"Do not use if anda cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet." -- In the information booklet.

"Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.

"For external use only!" -- On a curling iron.

"Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron.

"Do not use in shower." -- On a hair dryer.

"Do not use while sleeping." -- On a hair dryer.

"Do not use while sleeping atau unconscious." -- On a hand-held massaging device.

"Do not place this product into any electronic equipment." -- On the case of a chocolate...
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 acak picture, with no connection to the story
Random picture, with no connection to the story
I made this when I first started writing. So the grammer isn't very good..

Grady Edwards. A constant on the run serial killer, that is always changing his name. Today he met Susan at the grocery store, he introduced himself as David Harris. He pretended to be divorced, but in reality he murdered his old wife, and her family. "Yep, she was mad at me for my constant tenancy to take shit in the pool" David said. Everyone took a step back. David walked away. Unaware of the danger it will eventually cause Susan asked David to stay with her family. He agreed.

Susan's oldest son, Michael was returning...
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posted by Canada24
Critic: So our story begins when they spot two children who, anda guessed it, stopped caring.
Friend Bear: Hi. I'm Friend Bear, and this is Secret Bear. We're Care Bears. (both stand up and pose)
Jason: (in disgusted tone) What do anda want?
Friend Bear: Only to be your friends.
NC (vo): Actually, I always wondered what counted as quote/unquote "Caring." I mean, if I'm ordering a pizza with a friend, is it like...
[Cuts to skit with two NCs talking to each other]
NC 1: Hey, what kind of toppings anda want?
NC 2: Eh, I don't care. (In panicked tone) No, no, wait! I didn't mea- (sparkling effects sound...
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I still find this tampil quite humorious.
Though people don't seem to realize how many villain roles he actually has..

Is comedy blind to Gary's danger, and is always blaming Gary for, even though it's "puffy fuffy" who's the threat.
Even when Gary is about to be eaten.
Spongebob, instead of helping him, starts to scold him for his destruction and how he's still treating Puffy Fluffy, even when the belut is clearly about to eat him. SpongeBob continues to lecture Gary..

SpongeBob must wait patiently for the toy.
But he becomes very rude.
Not feeding Gary.
Flipping Sandy rudely....
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posted by zutaradragon
    Police are investigating a api at a local school building, which was full of what are now dead children and teachers. atau at least, presumed dead, as no bodies have actually been found. There was only one person left: a seemingly deranged babbling female teacher speaking of a giant blob, of sorts. The police instantly dismissed her ramblings as those of a traumatized and stressed mind and went back to work. Their investigation turned up large amounts of sulfur, which was very odd and completely unexplained. Most dismissed it, saying that the science labs must have just...
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1. Get one of those receipts and rub it on your cat until the receipt sticks, and watch them try to get it off. (Works with all cats, and most dogs. And sme receipts are better than others.)

2. Get a cup of water, when your dog atau cat turns away, dip your finger in the water and have one drop of water hit them, but make sure they aren't looking at you.When they took at anda look away until they look awy then repeat.

3. Get another cat atau dog to bug the other!
(Only if anda want two animals!)

4. When your dog atau cat is looking away, clap once and loud. But make sure they aren't looking at you, and anda are facing away.

5.( works better with cats.)
Get a piece of string. tie it so it makes a 'O' big enough so anda can put it on your cat's tail and make him spin trying to get it off.
What a ciuman means
kiss on forehead: I adore you
kiss on cheek: I'm glad we're together
kiss on hand: respect you
kiss on neck: I want you
kiss on shoulder:we belong together
kiss on lips: I cinta you

What gestures mean:
Holding hands: I like anda a lot
slap on butt:that belongs to me
hold on tight:I don't want to let anda go
looking n each others eyes:you're beautiful
play with hair:you're perfect
arms around waist:this is mine
laughing while kissing: I'm completely comfortable with you

A good boyfriend would:
Txt anda everysecond he's not at your side
hug anda every chance anda get &stays with you...
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posted by dollyllama247
i found this online and thought it was funny ^.^

1. Walk into the classroom like a super spy. (keep your back on the walls as anda walk, point your finger up like a gun, look around with shifty eyes, hum the mission impossible theme, etc.)

2. After everything your teacher says, ask why.

3. If your teacher is yelling at a classmate, wait for them to finish their tantrum then ask” DOES SOMEBODY NEED A HUG?????” very loudly.

4. If your teacher starts blowing up at anda for saying that simply reply “Wow, I can tell you’re a blast at parties”

5. Dress up like l (Death Note) and walk in with no...
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posted by KatiiCullen94
1.If anda know that the guy is a Knicks fan, get front seats to a Knicks game and then prevent him from watching the final. Send him to the refreshments stand to get anda a coke instead, ensuring that he misses seeing that last crucial game-winning basket.

2.Take him to a chick flick marathon. If that isn't annoying enough, kuis him throughout the movie about what he's thinking. Ensure that a big beefy fan of Sleepless in Seattle gets annoyed and sweetly tell him that your boyfriend could wipe the floor with him. Only be comforting after the guy gets a black eye.

3.Let him cook makan malam for you-...
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Jeez, so many lists about girls telling guys what they should do when imposing them and such... It's time to extinguish those high standards, with some cold, hard, facts about us. Fighting api with fire. *puts on sunglasses* Oh yeah.

So girls, here's a daftar about boys, oleh a boy.

Guys look, but don't flirt!
1. We look at other girls often, as ashamed as some of us might be about it. We're just naturally distracted. It, however, doesn't mean we're flirting with them straight away. Here's a pertanyaan I'd like to ask all girls in a relationship. What are anda expecting your boyfriend to do, cheat on...
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1- The numbers '172' can be found on the back of the U.S. $5 dollar bill in the bushes at the base of the lincoln Memorial.

2- Odontophobia is the fear of teeth.

3- The first known contraceptive was buaya dung, used oleh Egyptians in 2000 B.C.

4- When anda die your hair still grows for a couple of months.

5- It would take 11 Empire State Buildings, stacked one on puncak, atas of the other, to measure the Gulf of Mexico at its deepest point.

6- The first person selected as the Time Magazine Man of the tahun - Charles Lindbergh in 1927.

7- The most money ever paid for a cow in an auction was $1.3 million....
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Fake Friends: Never ask for food.
Real Friends: are the reason anda have no food.

Fake Friends: Call your parents Mr/Mrs.
Real Friends: Call your parents Dad/Mom.(Or something along those lines ;] )

Fake Friends: bail anda out of jail and tell anda what anda did was wrong.
Real Friends: Would sit selanjutnya to anda saying "Shoot ... we messed up ... but that was fun!"
Fake Friends: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
Real Friends: Keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours.

Fake Friends: know a few things about you.
Real Friends: Could write a book about anda with direct kutipan from you.

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10. We can wear guy clothes, but if they wear ours they get funny looks

9. At least one girl always survives in horror movies

8. We can put cotton between our toes and paint our nails without feeling the least bit silly

7. Our magazines have horoscopes

6. Girls with guy first names like Taylor sound cool, but it doesn't work the other way around

5. Our friends don't say "hi" oleh punching us in the arm

4. Yes PMS sucks, but at least we have an excuse to lay around eating cokelat once a month

3. Make-up covers any imperfections we may have

2. If we flirt with a cop, we can get out of a speeding ticket

1. Girl Talk... anda know, the way we all just understand each other without having to explain a thing
found this on the net:

18 Fun Things To Do In A Final That Does Not Matter (i.e. anda are going to fail the class completely no matter what anda get on the final exam)

1) Get the copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!"

2) Talk the entire way through the exam. Read pertanyaan aloud, debat your jawaban with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure anda can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3) Bring cheerleaders.

4) Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five menit into it, loudly say to the...
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I was born on a kacang plantation 62 detik before my dad blinked for the kajillionth time. The turkeys played an orchestra piece called "Eat my shorts", oleh Bart Simpson. Homer was right there, eating a donut, when Marge walked in with a turkey baster. Immediately, the orchestra fled to Treasure Island to retrieve a '92 Toyota Corona. Then Sir Francis itik jantan, drake showed up to ask me if I could cut his hair. He said, "I needeth a cuteth of my hair to impress Medusa." So I hopped on my hovercraft and grabbed my scissors. He gave me a pice of cokelat berbuat curang, fudge cake as a reward. I suddenly needed my diaper changed, so I went to my mommy and said, "Mom, I made a cow pie. Either give me a new diaper, atau eat my patty." She patted my head and changed me. And that's all about the hari I was born.
posted by slytherin360
found this on the net:

29 Annoying Ways to Order a pizza

1. Start the conversation with "My call to (Pizza Place), take one... and... ACTION!"

2. If using a touch-tone phone, press acak numbers while ordering. Tell the person taking the order, "would anda please stop doing that...?"

3. Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

4. Do not name your toppings; rather, spell them out.

5. Ask what the order taker is wearing.

6. Order 52 pepperoni slices arranged in a fractal pattern following from an equation anda are about to dictate. Ask if they're getting all of this...
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There were 3 men and they all died in a car crash and went to hell. When they got there the devil asked them all in turn a question.
To he first he berkata "what was your biggest sin on earth?" and the man replied "Oh man I just cinta alchol and being drunk man" so the devil showed the man to a room full of alchol of every type and keterangan and he put the man inside and berkata "see anda in 100 years" and locked the door.

To the detik man he asked the same pertanyaan and the man replied "oh man I just cinta to have sex with the ladies, I was really unfaithful to my wife man". So the devil took the...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Researchers in the UK examined lebih than 1000 jokes and placed them before 36,000 voters to determine the "official" 50 funniest jokes of all time.

And here they are:

50. I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'. So I went - and I got it.

49. A segel walks into a club...

48. Went to the corner toko - bought 4 corners.

47. So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants, it was Wedgie Kray.

46. I'll tell anda what I cinta doing lebih than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.

45. I tried water polo...
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posted by ilovepenguins
1. Let's go somewhere where we have to get really dressed up.

2. Wow, anda did your cuticles.

3. I'll pick anda up early, b/c I really want to meet your parents.

4. Want to hit the outlet mall this weekend?

5. If anda want to tanggal other guys too, that's cool with me.

6. anjing are fine, but kittens are lebih cuddly.

7. Hey, that kemeja looks really good with those jeans.

8. Carson Daly is sooo deep.

9. How can anyone watch boxing? It's totally violent.

10. I can't wait to see the new Freddie Prinze Jr. movie.

11. Hey, today's our "two months from the first hari we berkata hi" anniversary.

12. Didn't Gwyenth's outfit...
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