1. We aren’t mind readers!
2. We are not to be used as pawns in trying to make your girlfriends jealous.
3. When anda sleep over never boss me around in tempat tidur unless it is during sex.
4. Smoking is the biggest turn off.
5. It never hurts to work out.
6. If anda don’t want to hear the truth, don’t ask the question.
7. “Fine” atau “whatever” is not an appropriate ending to a conversation.
8. If anda want sex, just ask. (In case anda didn’t already know.)
9. Don’t expect guys to say as many sweet things as they do in the movies. (It takes a lot of guys and their wives to come up with those scripts).
10. Only model are able to wear most of the stuff anda see in fashion magazines.
11. No guy will complain if he comes halaman awal and sees anda in one of the following outfits: French Maid, School girl, bunny, atau just plain naked.
12. anda don’t need pakaian dalam to look sexy before bed, short cotton shorts and a tank puncak, atas are fine oleh us.
13. Girls look good naked so stop worrying.
14. Sharing your deepest feelings in no way guarantees reciprocity.
15. We are all kinky and willing to try anything that anda may enjoy, just let us know.
16. Every so often no matter whether it is true atau not remind us that we have the biggest penis you’ve ever dealt with.
17. If were not getting cinta we’ll start looking…(haha…just kidding…psych…I’m dead serious)
18. The greatest thing ever is to watch a girl touch herself.
19. Most of the time when I fantasize it is about another person.
20. If you, the girl, make out with another girl we won’t consider it cheating. Actually we strongly promote this behavior.
21. Your hair is like 14 inches long, how are we supposed to notice a quarter inch missing.
22. anda shouldn’t be flattered atau grossed out if we get an erection when dancing with you. All we need is Friction.
23. Porn…hmmm…Porn. Watching porn is like breathing it would just be wrong to ask us to stop.
24. We masturbate, usually lebih when we are in a relationship, can’t explain it but it is just fact.
25. Blue balls are not sporting equipment. Didn’t your parents teach anda not to quit.
26. Giving head is never a bad idea.
27. We are conservationists at heart, water is our biggest love, so mandi, shower with us.
28. There are three acceptable ways to wake up: (1) anda on puncak, atas of us. (2) Getting head. (3) Some sort of breakfast.
29. We don’t mind going to gay film with anda but don’t tell our friends.
30. anda can’t hold it against us if we cry after sports film atau “Old yeller.”
31. “The game is on” is an acceptable excuse to avoid any serious conversation.
32. Any harsh contact with the testicles should be assumed a serious injury but soft caresses are strongly encouraged.
33. You’re probably not as funny as anda think.
34. Brad Pitt is probably a cool guy but if I hear one lebih girl say “he’s so hot” he may have to die.
35. Your period should be referred to as Blowjob week. (Influenced oleh a Maxim article)
36. Cooking makes a girl that much lebih attractive especially if she can use a grill.
37. anda can’t get mad if we refuse to hook up your “ugly friend” with one of our friends.
38. For every fart that slips out when anda are around we successfully hold in about 15, enduring excruciating pain to do this.
39. If we want to take naked pictures of anda it is because we are proud and want to tampil anda off to our friends.
40. The red light means the video camera is off.
41. A guy should be considered sensitive if he asks whether anda want to do it with the lights on atau off.
42. Whip cream and cokelat syrup are not just condiments for ice cream also Altoids just don’t make your breath fresher.
43. Nothing anda will ever do will entitle anda to operate the remote control. (Unless operating means handing it to us.)
44. The only thing left to be berkata after sex is “goodnight.”
45. Video games have helped us develop such finger skills that should only encourage us to play lebih often.
46. Critiquing our driving is only detik to critiquing our cinta making.
47. Guys nights out are sacred events. If we answer pertanyaan we could be castrated.
48. If anda ask us to go shopping anda have to at least entertain the idea of having sex in a changing room.
49. The jeans don’t make your pantat, keledai look fat. Your fat pantat, keledai makes your pantat, keledai look fat.
50. 99.5% of the time we didn’t mean to hurt you.