Slytherin Bowl

Kidnap the Potter boy!
Make him come and fight!
Take away his wand,
And then torture him tonight!

You know that we all can’t wait
For the Potter boy to meet his fate
If he won’t come to battle
We will capture and murder his mates!

Wait! I know of a plan that’s fun
To catch this stupid chosen one!
Let’s all help the Dark Lord to rise
So Harry will meet his demise!

Kidnap the Potter boy!
Skin him like a fox!
Lock him up in Azkaban
Then see if he talks!

Then Mr. Voldy, our Dark Lord
Will take things in his hands of course!
He’ll be so pleased about Potter’s slain!
And all the power we will gain!

Weeeee!!!...

Credit: sparknotes.com. They have this thing every week called the "Think Tank", and this was the problem from a few weeks ago. Can anda guys help our Lord solve the problem? atau will he crucio anda into oblivion for not being able to? How word-savvy are anda fellow Death Eaters??

Everybody's favorit Dark Lord is dressed in his finest white zoot suit (picture Joseph Gordon Levitt, but with vastly lebih figurative blood on his hands, atau Sue Sylvester, with vastly lebih figurative blood on hers) and can't wait to meet up with—well, no one, because he has no friends. But nonetheless, he's breathless...

Credit: mugglenet.com

1. Make him take a shower.

2. Make him use shampoo in aforementioned shower.

3. Make him use clarifying shampoo.

4. Apparate selanjutnya to him, hand him a tube of super-strong facial cleanser, then quickly Disapparate before he realizes what happened.

5. Enchant this cleanser to follow him around until he uses it.

6. ...enchant the cleanser to follow him around anyway.

7. Tell him anda mencuri his teddy bear.

8. Tell him anda won't give it back until he agrees to wash his hair.

9. When he washes his hair, tell him anda were just kidding and berkata teddy beruang has already been destroyed.

10. Sneak...

Credit: mugglenet.com

Greetings, new follower:

If anda are membaca this letter then anda have doubtless been accepted into the select band of professional wizards known as the Death Eaters. If oleh some unprecedented chance anda are membaca this and anda have not been accepted into the Death Eaters then I suggest anda put down this letter and leave now, atau the consequences for anda will be as terrible as my lifelong study into the Dark Arts can make them.

Please find enclosed a short introductory guide to Death Eating, which anda must memorize and then eat, to prevent security leaks. (Due to an unfortunate...

Name: Katherina Nastacia Smirnov (Also sometimes spelled Smirnoff). Goes oleh "Kate". If you're mad at her, use her full name, :P

Kate joined the Death Eaters when Voldemort was first in power, and is one of the few female Death Eaters. She is an extremely skilled and accomplished witch, with excellent dueling skills.
Kate is Russian, and started out her schooling at Durmstrang, but transferred to Hogwarts during her third year. She told people it was because she wanted a better education, but it was really because she'd gotten kicked out of Durmstrang. On purpose. She hated it there, and she...

“What’s the matter Potter? Afraid to fight me? anda shouldn’t be since anda do every damn hari we see each other!” Snape yelled angrily at his enemy.
    “Oh that’s it Sev!” And with that, James lunged at Snape, tackling him to the floor. Hitting and punching went on for about seven menit before a spell was shot at Jame’s back, disabling his mobility. Snape stared up at James in shock and finally pushed the Frozen teenager off of him. He looked to the direction in which the spell came, stunned to see Bellatrix Black’s wand smoking at it’s tip.
    “Why...

Still Lenzetta’s POV:
    The selanjutnya evening was probably the worst since the night of my parents deaths. We held one of notorious meetings which involved of course locating Harry Potter and a little bit of plans to overthrow the ministry. Those topics were fine to speak of, I’ve diberikan some noteworthy suggestions of my own that the Dark Lord seemed pleased with, but the ending of the meeting was what made me feel ill.
    “Ladies, gentlemen,” he berkata right as people were going to get up from their seats. “For those of anda who do not know, we have...

Credit: link. I didn't write it myself.

"I like taking pointless facebook surveys as much as the selanjutnya person. But, since they’re mostly about kissing, I started to wonder how someone completely incapable of feeling cinta might handle such things. So I just had to tag my good pal Lord Voldemort in my most baru saja survey. Here's what he had to say:

Was your last ciuman standing up, sitting down, atau lying down?
The only ciuman I believe in is the Dementor's kiss, and as I have very little soul remaining in my withered husk of a body, one would have little effect on me.

Whose tempat tidur were anda on last?
Nagini's,...

Full Name: Leah Winthrop Colchester. Just call her Leah atau Col.

Leah joined the Death Eaters about two years after his first reign of power. Her parents were… "funders of his campaign", anda might say, but not direct members. Having an impatient mind, she decided to gabung them directly, instead of following in her parents' footsteps. They were not happy with their only child's decision but agreed to send her to Hogwarts, where she was sorted into Slytherin with hopes of joining the Dark Lord.

Leah's biggest flaw is holding grudges. If someone did something to her, she'll never forget it. If they...

Credit: www.the-leaky-cauldron.org. I didn't write this.

"This afternoon, I was lucky enough to be among 400 other movie fan to attend a test screening of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2" in Chicago, Illinois.
Rumors had been circuiting around the internet about this screening, but confirmation that it was Harry Potter didn't come until just before the film started. Since this was a working cut of the film, many effects and scenes were not finished. At least 50% of the special effects were still in the CGI rendering stage, and green screens were visible throughout the film. Also,...

These are a bunch of funny alternate endings to Harry Potter I found. I did NOT write them.

Scooby Doo ending: Voldemort is captured, and is revealed to be Filch wearing a mask. As he is hauled away, he shouts, “And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for anda meddling kids!”

South Park ending: After defeating Voldemort, Harry and Ron address the audience, saying, “You know, I’ve learned something today.” Suddenly, Ginny is run over oleh the Knight Bus, prompting Ron to shout, “They killed Ginny!” Harry responds, “You bastards!” Neville laughs and says it’s...

    Xander walked quickly down the long corridor dragging a prisoner behind him.
    “Help! Help!” the woman laughs as she stumbles along in Xander’s grasp, “I’m being oppressed!”
Rolling his eyes, the young prison guard throws the deranged woman into her cell, causing her to fall to her knees. He quickly shuts the prison bars and glares at her through them.
    “My, my, sir,” the woman began smirking up at her guard, “You just met me, no need to be so aggressive with me yet.”
    “Ms. Clement,...